Inside My Head

Hello all! Teigan here…I’m another newbie here to BayArt, from the beautiful Sunshine Coast in Australia, and I am excited to share a bit of my soul with all of you.

I really wasn’t sure what to write for my first post here. I thought maybe  I could pretend I was some crazy beautiful hipster that spends her time travelling the world and making out with charming Italian men that own a winery… As interesting as those posts would be, I decided to maybe write about something a little more relatable and very consuming.

It is so consuming in fact that I have dedicated a whole blog site to it. Here check me out at: https://apprehensivesoul.wordpress.com/

Ok, ok, I’ll get straight to it then. I’m here to talk about that monster under our bed… Anxiety.

Scary, right? Well it is. Whether you know someone or are personally affected by this mental illness, you’ll know well enough that it is terrifying.

I was diagnosed with Generalised Anxiety Disorder about a year ago, although I know I have suffered with it for much longer. Slowly this fear pulled me out of University, away from friends and family, and limited my ability to leave the house. I have an awful fear of being sick, of being trapped and of being alone. When someone asks me why I am worried I tell them and they will usually reply with, “Why would you be scared of being sick? Live in the now. Deal with it as it comes.”

Thank you. So helpful. I’M CURED!

The truth is, I tell myself things like that everyday. I have daily affirmations. I am probably the most optimistic person you’ll ever meet, but my anxiety doesn’t just subside. I’m not saying I haven’t improved, because I have and it’s made me so happy. However I can’t just shut off my anxiety with the flick of a switch.

This is where I feel most people are fighting a silent battle. I can’t be the only one that has had a friend or family member (maybe even a professional) tell you, “Just don’t worry, you will be fine.”

A family member of mine, one supposedly very close to me, whined that I “use anxiety as a way to get of things”.

 

It hurts to see that people suffering from an invisible illness have to deal with not only the illness itself but the doubtful words of others. How does someone expect you to feel better when you don’t feel supported?

Anxiety, or any mental illness, is not an excuse. We do not choose to have panic attacks in the middle of shopping centres or to run out of the office to hurl. We want to feel ‘normal’. We want to be able to do the same things as everyone else without irrational fears weighing us down. Our minds are so powerful that a thought of our own can make us physically ill, imagine what the words of others can do.

Know how powerful those words are. Whether you suffer from anxiety or you meet someone with this illness, your words to yourself or to others can make the difference between a panic attack and the feeling of security. Show support. You’re worthy of receiving it so deliver it.

I intend to share stories, strategies and just my day to day living (with anxiety) on my own blog and here on BayArt so if you’re interested stick around. This topic of judgement towards people with anxiety was on my mind this sunny afternoon in Australia so I decided to let my fingers type exactly what I thought. I’ll be sure to dive into more depth in the future.

Have a beautiful day, be positive and be kind.

 

11 thoughts on “Inside My Head”

  1. Hi. Thanks so much for your post. Finally, I had always thought that I was the only one who felt this way. Anxiety has crippled me from so many things. To get myself to do anything is really a feat on its on. The worry never goes away. Friends don’t understand , they just think that I am a worry bunny.

    • It’s refreshing to find others who understand and I’m glad we can connect.
      However it’s sad that others don’t understand, to them they can’t see a thing but to us it is so consuming. I know that fear can be conquered, so hold on. xx

  2. Anxiety is an ugly illness and often comes hand in hand with depression, I have witnessed my daughter go through both from a very young age and have experienced it myself too.Thankfully she has started to recover with the help of her medication and the support of those around her, it’s been a long exhausting journey for all involved. More awareness is definitely needed, thank you for sharing 🙂

    • I commend you for supporting her through it. Sometimes it can be just as frustrating to be the support group for someone with a mental illness. I know my partner cops a lot, I don’t give him enough slack. Thank you for reading!

  3. Dealing with anxiety is a major struggle for millions of people around the world. It takes a lot of courage to open-up on the internet like this, but I suspect lots of people will appreciate your authenticity. Keep up the good work!

  4. Teigan,
    what a wonderful post. I, too have anxiety, coupled with PTSD and depression. It can debilitating. I am glad that you are starting a conversation about mental illness. It is something that is starting to happen in the US as well but still we have a long way to go. Thank you for sharing your experience.

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