Melancholy Moodiness

I had a really lovely day today. For the most part, I made good decisions around food. And yet for no apparent reason, this evening I feel incredibly melancholy and moody. I’m overcome with a range of emotions I can’t even describe. To be honest, I just want to cry. Why? I have absolutely no idea. … Read more Melancholy Moodiness

Not in black and white

Perfectionistic thinking. It can be a bit of a curse. Apparently it can also be a really great personality trait – but I suspect one would have to utilise it in a slightly healthier way. When you’re a perfectionist, the world is black and white. I’m right or wrong, it’s easy or hard, I’m good at … Read more Not in black and white

Vanquishing the Voices

I’m trying to picture a life free from disordered eating. What would it look like? How would I feel? What would be different? The voice of doubt always wants to knock me down, but I’m working hard to vanquish that voice, and bring forth positive messages to empower recovery. In this picture, my external life would … Read more Vanquishing the Voices

Looking forward

Today was a non-linear recovery day. You know – the old cha cha cha – a few steps forward, a few steps back. Recovery is a non-linear process. But that’s okay – I keep telling myself… I made some really excellent decisions today and made some really excellent progress. Then I made some really crap decisions and slipped … Read more Looking forward

Easter Egg Epiphanies

Today I ate Easter eggs. I didn’t enjoy them. And it isn’t Easter. There are bags and bags of leftover solid little eggs at work, and apparently we can help ourselves. I’m not sure my colleagues realise what that actually means to somebody with an eating disorder. The only thing stopping me eating the thousand or … Read more Easter Egg Epiphanies