20 + Best Bartender Quotes: Exclusive Selection

Bartender is someone who makes and serves drinks in a bar. Inspirational bartender quotes will encourage growth in life, make you wiser and broaden your perspective.

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Famous Bartender Quotes

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. – Ernest Hemmingway

There has ling been a happy symbiotic relationship between kitchen and bar. Simply put, the kitchen wants booze, and the bartender wants food. – Anthony Bourdain

If Jesus was a bartender, He would still only be half as cool as Carlos. – Richard Kadrey

A professional bartender is someone who can do his or her best work when he or she doesn’t feel like it. – Bruce Tomlinson

Only one way to cover a story like this, and make that a double, bartender, please… – P.J. O’Rourke

Will there be any bartenders up there in Heaven, will the pubs never close?… – Richard Thompson

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory… – Albert Einstein

If you drink, don’t drive. Don’t even putt. – Dean Martin

Lady bartenders live a tougher life than anybody knows… – James Crumley

I believe that in your heart you already know something is profoundly wrong. When bartenders are responsible for drunk drivers’ acts, and gunmakers are responsible for criminals’ acts, and nobody is responsible for O. J. Simpson’s acts, something is wrong… – Charlton Heston

By the time a bartender knows what drink a man will have before he orders, there is little else about him worth knowing. – Don Marquis

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut… – Ernest Hemingway

A woman drove me to drink and I never even had the courtesy to thank her. – W.C. Fields

A professional bartender is someone who can do his or her best work when he or she doesn’t feel like it… – Bruce Tomlinson

I was a bartender for a long time, so I know how to make drinks, but I’m more likely to offer them than to have them. I think this is one of the reasons why I get to live longer than my great-grandmother did, and why I get to produce more writing than she did, and why my marriage isn’t in dire straits… – Elizabeth Gilbert

The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind… – Humphrey Bogart

A theory that you can’t explain to a bartender is probably no damn good… – Ernest Rutherford

The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind. – Humphrey Bogart

You know you have a drinking problem when the bartender knows your name — and you’ve never been to that bar before… – Zach Galifianakis

’m a bartender. I like recipes. They’re concretes. Was the drink recipe for seduction one shot charm and two shots self-deception, shaken, not stirred?… – Karen Marie Moning

My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn’t need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle. – Henny Youngman

You know you’re in trouble, when the bartender cries… – Michael Peterson

Work is the curse of the drinking classes… – Oscar Wilde

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory. – Albert Einstein

A good writer is not, per se, a good book critic. No more so than a good drunk is automatically a good bartender… – Jim Bishop

The greatest accomplishment of a bartender lies in his ability to exactly suit his customer… – Harry Gordon Johnson

I feel sorry for people who don’t drink. When they wake up in the morning, that’s as good as they’re going to feel all day. – Frank Sinatra

I drink only to make my friends seem interesting… – Don Marquis

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