36+ Best Clever Quotes: Exclusive Selection

Inspirational clever quotes will make you look at life differently and help you live a meaningful life.

Most Famous Clever Quotes

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes Jack Handey

Today’s good mood is sponsored by coffee

 Bob Looks like you’ve been missing a lot of work lately Peter I wouldn’t say I’ve been missing it, Bob Bob Paul Wilson and Peter Ron Livingston Office Space

Three cups of coffee a day keeps the doctor away!

Clothes make the man Naked people have little or no influence in society Mark Twain

A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems Alfred Renyi

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet to see who they really are Will Ferrell

The most dangerous drinking game is seeing how long I can go without coffee

I love being married It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life Rita Rudner

I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake Lewis Black

Ned, I would love to stand here and talk with you but I’m not going to Phil Connors 

When my blood runs black as the moonless night, and my heartbeat sounds as the Warriors march, only then may you say, I’ve had enough coffee

When your mother asks, Do you want a piece of advice? it is a mere formality. It doesn’t matter if you answer yes or no You’re going to get it anyway Erma Bombeck

Sometimes I go hours without drinking coffee it’s called sleeping

I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford Then I want to move in with them Phyllis Diller

Life without coffee is like something without something sorry, I haven’t had any coffee yet

Never follow anyone else’s path Unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost and you see a path Then by all means follow that path Ellen DeGeneres

I like my coffee like I like myself strong, sweet, and too hot for you Jac Vanek

Insomnia sharpens your math skills because you spend all night calculating how much sleep you’ll get if you’re able to fall asleep right now

Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze Jean Kerr

Breaking up is like knocking over a Coke machine You can’t do it in one push you have to rock it back and forth a few times, and then it goes over Jerry Jerry Seinfeld

My coffee machine is the most beautiful person in the world to me

I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious Michael Scott 

Everyone should believe in something I believe I will have another coffee

I walk around like everything’s fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off

Coffee, because adulting is hard

I haven’t spoken to my wife in years I didn’t want to interrupt her Rodney Dangerfield

I don’t have a problem with caffeine I have a problem without it

I used to sell furniture for a living The trouble was, it was my own Les Dawson

Maybe she’s born with it Maybe it’s caffeine

There’s nothing wrong with you that an expensive operation can’t prolong Surgeon Graham Chapman Monty Python’s Flying Circus

Drink coffee and pretend to know what you’re doing

Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a desert island what book would I bring How to Build a Boat Steven Wright

Coffee, the favorite drink of the civilized world Thomas Jefferson

There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it Mindy Kaling,Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?