Douglas Noel Adams was an English author, screenwriter, essayist, humorist, satirist and dramatist. Profoundly inspirational Douglas Adams quotes will fire up your brain and inspire you to look at life differently while making you laugh.
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Famous Douglas Adams Quotes
Time is an illusion. Lunchtime is doubly so. Douglas Adams, ‘The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy
Having not said anything the first time, it was somehow even more difficult to broach the subject the second time around.
He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream, and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it. Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy.
All he knew was that his working days were miserable and he had a succession of lousy holidays.
I’d far rather be happy than right any day. Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy.
All the clouds knew was that they loved him and wanted to be near him, to cherish him, and to water him.
Would it save you a lot of time if I just gave up and went mad now? Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy.
See first, think later, then test. But always see first. Otherwise you will only see what you were expecting.
If there’s anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now. Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy.
There was a point to this story, but it has temporarily escaped the chronicler’s mind.
The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don’t. Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy.
He almost danced to the fridge, found the three least hairy things in it, put them on a plate and watched them intently for two minutes. Since they made no attempt to move within that time he called them breakfast and ate them.
Space is big. You just won’t believe how vastly, hugely, mind bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it’s a long way down the road to the chemist’s, but that’s just peanuts to space. Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy.
But the reason I call myself by my childhood name is to remind myself that a scientist must also be absolutely like a child.
Did I do anything wrong today, or has the world always been like this, and I’ve been too wrapped up in myself to notice? Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy.
Grown men, he told himself, in flat contradiction of centuries of accumulated evidence about the way grown men behave, do not behave like this.
Ford you’re turning into a penguin. Stop it. Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy.
If he sees a thing, he must say that he sees it, whether it was what he thought he was going to see or not.
This must be Thursday, said Arthur to himself, sinking low over his beer. ‘I never could get the hang of Thursdays. Douglas Adams, ‘The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy.
He learned to communicate with birds and discovered their conversation was fantastically boring. It was all to do with windspeed, wingspans, power to weight ratios and a fair bit about berries.
My God, they are! They’re knocking my house down. What the hell am I doing in the pub, Ford? Arthur Dent
Any civilization that had so far lost its head as to need to include a set of detailed instructions for use in a package of toothpicks, was no longer a civilization in which I could live and stay sane
I wonder who this ship belongs to anyway Arthur Dent
Is there any tea on this spaceship? Arthur Dent
He felt a spasm of excitement because he knew instinctively who it was, or at least knew who it was he wanted it to be, and once you know what it is you want to be true, instinct is a very useful device for enabling you to know that it is.
Why don’t people get rid of the lizards? Arthur Dent
Ford Prefect suppressed a little giggle of evil satisfaction, realized that he had no reason to suppress it, and laughed out loud, a wicked laugh.
I thought you said it was a democracy. Arthur Dent
No. No games. He wanted her and didn’t care who knew it. He definitely and absolutely wanted her, longed for her.
You mean, it comes from a world of lizards? Arthur Dent
He actually caught himself saying things like Yippee, as he pranced ridiculously round the house.
Ford! there’s an infinite number of monkeys outside who want to talk to us about this script for Hamlet they’ve worked out. Arthur Dent
He sniggered. He didn’t like to think of himself as the sort of person who giggled or sniggered, but he had to admit that he had been giggling and sniggering almost continuously for well over half an hour now.
Yes, I did. It was on display in the bottom of a locked filing cabinet stuck in a disused lavatory with a sign on the door saying ‘Beware of the Leopard Arthur Dent
The air was stifling, but he liked it because it was stifling city air, full of excitingly unpleasant smells, dangerous music, and the distant sound of warring police tribes.
It’s at times like this when I’m trapped in a Vogon airlock with a man from Betelgeuse. Arthur Dent
For a moment he felt good about this. A moment or two later he felt bad about feeling good about it. Then he felt good about feeling bad about feeling good about it and satisfied, drove on into the night.
I really wish I’d listened to what my mother told me when I was young. Arthur Dent
Mark Knopfler has an extraordinary ability to make a Schecter Custom Stratocaster hoot and sing like angels on a Saturday night, exhausted from being good all week and needing a stiff drink.
The story so far: In the beginning, the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move. Douglas Adams, The Restaurant At The End Of The Universe.
Rob McKenna was a miserable fatherless child and he knew it because he’d had a lot of people point it out to him over the years and he saw no reason to disagree with them except the obvious one which was that he liked disagreeing with people, particularly people he disliked, which included, at the last count, everybody.
There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe.
He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it.
Nothing travels faster than the speed of light, with the possible exception of bad news, which obeys its own special laws. Douglas Adams, Mostly Harmless.
If there’s anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now.
Isn’t it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too? Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy.
Drink up. The world’s about to end.
The average population of all the planets in the Universe can be said to be zero. Douglas Adams, The Restaurant At The End Of The Universe.
Any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through, and still know where his towel is is clearly a man to be reckoned with.
It follows that the population of the whole Universe is also zero and that any people you may meet from time to time are merely the products of a deranged imagination. Douglas Adams, The Restaurant At The End Of The Universe.
My universe is my eyes and my ears. Anything else is hearsay.
My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fiber and that I am therefore excused from saving universes. Douglas Adams, Life, the Universe and Everything.
His first theory was that if human beings didn’t keep exercising their lips, their mouths probably shriveled up.
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be. Douglas Adams. The Long Dark TeaTime of the Soul.
Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.
Marvin was humming ironically because he hated humans so much.Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.
You live and learn. At any rate, you live. Douglas Adams, Mostly Harmless.
It’s a well known economic phenomenon but tragic to see it in operation, for the more shoe shops there were, the more shoes they had to make and the worse and more unwearable they became. And the worse they were to wear, the more people had to buy to keep themselves shod, and the more shops proliferated, until the whole economy of the place passed what I believe is termed the Shoe Event Horizon, and it became no longer economically possible to build anything other than shoe shops. Result collapse, ruin and famine.
A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools. Douglas Adams
Reality is frequently inaccurate.
This planet has or rather had a problem, which was this: most of the people living on it were unhappy for pretty much of the time. Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.
The History of every major Galactic Civilization tends to pass through three distinct and recognizable phases, those of Survival, Inquiry and Sophistication, otherwise known as the How, Why, and Where phases. For instance, the first phase is characterized by the question How can we eat? the second by the question Why do we eat?’ and the third by the question ‘Where shall we have lunch?
The impossible often has a kind of integrity to it which the merely improbable lacks. Douglas Adams
Shee, you guys are so unhip it’s a wonder your bums don’t fall off.
Words used carelessly, as if they did not matter in any serious way, often allowed otherwise well-guarded truths to seep through. Douglas Adams
I’m so great even when I get tongue tied talking to myself.
The secret of healthy hitchhiking is to eat junk food. Douglas Adams
In an infinite Universe anything can happen, said Ford. Even survival. Strange but true.
All opinions are not equal. Some are a very great deal more robust, sophisticated, and well supported in logic and argument than others. Douglas Adams
If you ever find you need help again, you know, if you’re in trouble, need a hand out of a tight corner
A learning experience is one of those things that say, ‘You know that thing you just did? Don’t do that. Douglas Adams
The little waiter’s eyebrows wandered about his forehead in confusion.
He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it. Douglas Adams
He didn’t know why he had become President of the Galaxy, except that it seemed a fun thing to be.
It can be very dangerous to see things from somebody else’s point of view without the proper training. Douglas Adams, Mostly Harmless.
Marvin, he said, just get this elevator going up will you? We’ve got to get to Zarniwoop.
I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by. Douglas Adams
Trouble with a long journey like this, continued the Captain, ‘is that you end up just talking to yourself a lot, which gets terribly boring because half the time you know what you’re going to say next.
For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen. Douglas Adams
I’ve never met all these people you speak of. And neither, I suspect, have you. They only exist in words we hear. It is folly to say you know what is happening to other people. Only they know, if they exist. They have their own Universes of their eyes and ears.
A beach house isn’t just real estate. It’s a state of mind. Douglas Adams, Mostly Harmless.
Don’t believe anything you read on the net. Except this. Well, including this, I suppose. Douglas Adams.
