Your pup instantly improves your mood and can help you to maintain a more positive, optimistic perspective on life. Inspirational funniest dog quotes will fire up your brain and encourage you to look at life differently while making you laugh.
If you’re searching for hilarious quotes and best sarcastic quotes that perfectly capture what you’d like to say or just want to feel inspired yourself, browse through an amazing collection of extremely funny divorce quotes, hilarious dance quotes and funniest horse quotes.
Famous Funny Dog Quotes
No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as much as the dog does. Christopher Morley
Handle every situation like a dog. If you can’t eat it or play with it, just pee on it and walk away. Unknown
Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul, chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we’re the greatest hunters on earth! Anne Tyler
If aliens saw us walking our dogs and picking up their poop, who would they think is in charge? Unknown
My cats inspire me daily. They inspire me to get a dog! Greg Curtis
I once decided not to date a guy because he wasn’t excited to meet my dog. I mean, this was like not wanting to meet my mother. Bonnie Schacter
I don’t think twice about picking up my dog’s poop, but if another dog’s poop is next to it, I think, ‘Eww, dog poop! Jonah Goldberg
What do dogs do on their day off? Can’t lie around – that’s their job! George Carlin
A dog desires affection more than its dinner. Well – almost. Charlotte Gray
If you’re uncomfortable around my dog, I’m happy to lock you in the other room when you come over. Unknown
A boy can learn a lot from a dog — obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down. Robert Benchley
Cute Funny Dog Quotes
Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read. Groucho Marx
Dogs never bite me. Just humans. Marilyn Monroe
In order to keep a true perspective of one’s importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him. Derek Bruce
If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail. Fran Lebowitz
Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. Ann Landers
If our dog doesn’t like you, we probably won’t either. Unknown
Choosing a dog may be the only chance you get to pick a relative. Unknown
Leave me alone – I’m only speaking to dogs today. Unknown
You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, ‘Wow, you’re right! I never would’ve thought of that!’ Dave Barry
A dog can express more with his tail in minutes than his owner can express with his tongue in hours. Unknown
Dogs teach us a very important lesson in life: The mailman is not to be trusted Sian Ford
To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. Aldous Huxley
Some days you’re the dog; some days you’re the hydrant. Unknown
The more people I meet, the more I love my dog. Unknown
When I die my dog gets everything. Unknown
Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that is how dogs spend their lives. Sue Murphy
A well trained dog will make no attempt to share your lunch. He will just make you feel so guilty that you cannot enjoy it. Helen Thomson
You can trust your dog to guard your house but never trust your dog to guard your sandwich. Unknown
Dogs teach us a very important lesson in life: The mail man is not to be trusted Sian Ford
Less people, more dogs. Unknown
Amazing Funny Dog Quotes
Dogs are my favorite people. Unknown
The only person who understands me is my dog. Unknown
I don’t who care who dies in the movie, as long as the dog lives. Unknown
I am one dog short of crazy. Unknown
Dogs are great. Bad dogs, if you can really call them that, are perhaps the greatest of them all. John Grogan
I’ve seen a look in dogs’ eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that dogs think humans are nuts. John Steinbeck
The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. Andy Rooney
My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That’s almost $21.00 in dog money. Joe Weinstein
If your dog is fat, you aren’t getting enough exercise. Unknown
No home decor is complete without dog hair. Unknown
It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes. Jay London
Reason number 106 why dogs are smarter than humans: once you leave the litter, you sever contact with your mothers. Jodi Picoult
The best therapist has fur and four legs. Unknown
Whoever said you can’t buy happiness forgot about puppies. Unknown
Without my dog my wallet would be full my house would be clean but my heart would be empty. Unknown
Nothing in the world is friendlier than a wet dog. Unknown
You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog. Harry Truman
If you want the best seat in the house, you’ll have to move the dog. Unknown
Every snack you make, every meal you bake, every bite you take…I’ll be watching you. Unknown
This home is filled with love and dog hair. Unknown
It’s tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won’t drink from my glass. Rodney Dangerfield
Beware! Dog can’t hold its licker. Unknown
Dogs are like potato chips. You can’t have just one. Unknown
Life without a dog is like an unsharpened pencil. It has no point. Unknown
“What I like most about people is their dogs. Unknown
When an 85 pound mammal licks your tears away, and then tries to sit on your lap, it’s hard to feel sad. Kristan Higgins
