Friendship is a situation in which two people are friends. Inspirational funny friendship quotes will brighten up your day and make you feel ready to take on anything.
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Famous Funny Friendship Quotes
Candor is a compliment; it implies equality. It’s how true friends talk. Peggy Noonan
I don’t like to commit myself about heaven and hell you see, I have friends in both places. Mark Twain
There is nothing like puking with somebody to make you into old friends. Sylvia Plath
It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Are we going to be friends forever? asked Piglet. Even longer, Pooh answered. A.A. Milne
Tis the privilege of friendship to talk nonsense, and have her nonsense respected. Charles Lamb
Friends people who borrow my books and set wet glasses on them. Edwin Arlington Robinson
Marriage is a sort of friendship recognized by the police. Robert Louis Stevenson
There are three faithful friends, an old wife, an old dog, and ready money. Benjamin Franklin
There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate. Linda Grayson
True friends fiercely debate issues and still walk away as friends. Frank Sonnenberg
Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival. C.S. Lewis
Most of us don’t need a psychiatric therapist as much as a friend to be silly with. Robert Brault
Some people go to priests; others to poetry; I to my friends. Virginia Woolf
The imaginary friends I had as a kid dropped me because their friends thought I didn’t exist. Aaron Machado
We know our friends by their defects rather than by their merits. William Somerset Maugham
It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them. Ralph Waldo Emerson
If you have two friends in your lifetime, you’re lucky. If you have one good friend, you’re more than lucky. S.E. Hinton
Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: What! You too? I thought I was the only one. C.S. Lewis
There’s not a word yet for old friends who’ve just met. Jim Henson
You can always tell a real friend: when you’ve made a fool of yourself he doesn’t feel you’ve done a permanent job. Laurence J. Peter
Friendship is not possible between two women, one of whom is very well dressed. Laurie Colwin
I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar, but I cherish the friend who for me does not consult his calendar. Robert Brault
One sure way to lose another woman’s friendship is to try to improve her flower arrangements. Marcelene Cox
A good friend is a connection to life a tie to the past, a road to the future, the key to sanity in a totally insane world. Lois Wyse
Men kick friendship around like a football and it doesn’t seem to crack. Women treat it like glass and it falls to pieces. Anne Lindbergh
Two things you will never have to chase: True friends true love. Mandy Hale
There is nothing like puking with somebody to make you into old friends. Sylvia Plath
Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival. C.S. Lewis
Friends make you smile best friends make you giggle ’til you pee your pants. Terri Guillemets
Men kick friendship around like a football, but it doesn’t seem to crack. Women treat it like glass and it goes to pieces. Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Most of us don’t need a psychiatric therapist as much as a friend to be silly with. Robert Brault
Part of the journey in life is slipping and falling along the way; in these times true friends are the ones who pick you up and dust you off. Ken Poirot
Friends are people who know you really well and like you anyway. Greg Tamblyn
The holy passion of Friendship is so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money. Mark Twain
If you can survive 11 days in cramped quarters with a friend and come out laughing, your friendship is the real deal. Oprah Winfrey
Friendship is the only cement that will ever hold the world together. Woodrow T. Wilson
True friends don’t judge each other, they judge other people together. Emilie Saint Genis
There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate. Linda Grayson
A good friend will help you move. But a best friend will help you move a dead body. Jim Hayes
Tis the privilege of friendship to talk nonsense, and to have her nonsense respected. Charles Lamb
You can always tell a real friend when you’ve made a fool of yourself he doesn’t feel you’ve done a permanent job. Laurence J. Peter
A friend knows the song in my heart and sings it to me when my memory fails. Donna Roberts
When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, Damn, that was fun. Groucho Marx
It’s the friends you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter. Marlene Dietrich
A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked. Bernard Meltzer
Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes. Friedrich Nietzsche
Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down. Oprah Winfrey
There’s not a word yet for old friends who’ve just met. Jim Henson
A true friend is someone who is there for you when they would rather be someplace else. Len Wein
No one is a friend to his friend who does not love in return. Plato
A friend is one that knows you as you are, understands where you have been, accepts what you have become, and still, gently allows you to grow. William Shakespeare
A friend can tell you things you don’t want to tell yourself. Frances Ward Weller
The holy passion of friendship is so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money. Mark Twain
Friendship is like money, easier made than kept. Samuel Butler
I’ve always said that in politics, your enemies can’t hurt you, but your friends will kill you. Ann Richards
Friends are the siblings God never gave us. Mencius
I have no trouble with my enemies. I can take care of my enemies all right. But my damn friends they’re the ones that keep me walking the floor nights! Warren G. Harding
Friends are relatives you make for yourself. Eustache Deschamps
There are three faithful friends, an old wife, an old dog, and ready money. Benjamin Franklin
Talk between women friends is always therapy. Jayne Anne Phillips
Friendship is like money, easier made than kept. Samuel Butler
The capacity for friendship is God’s way of apologizing for our families. Jay McInerney
True friendship is seen through the heart, not through the eyes. Friedrich Nietzsche
If you are ever lucky enough to find a weirdo, never let them go. Matthew Gray Gubler
No one is a friend to his friend who does not love in return. Plato
Friends should be like books, few, but hand selected. C. J. Langenhoven
Sometimes me think, What is friend? Then me say, Friend is someone to share the last cookie with. Cookie Monster
A snowball in the face is surely the perfect beginning to a lasting friendship. Markus Zusak
I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal. Jane Austen
Only a true best friend can protect you from your immortal enemies. Richelle Mead
You find out who your real friends are when you’re involved in a scandal. Elizabeth Taylor
A good friend will help you move. But a best friend will help you move a dead body. Jim Hayes
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim. George Carlin
Friends make you smile best friends make you giggle ’til you pee your pants. Terri Guillemets
To like and dislike the same things, that is what makes a solid friendship.” Sallust
Life is an awful, ugly place to not have a best friend. Sarah Desse
Never leave a friend behind. Friends are all we have to get us through this life and they are the only things from this world that we could hope to see in the next. Dean Koontz
Things are never quite as scary when you’ve got a best friend. Bill Watterson
A friend can tell you things you don’t want to tell yourself. Frances Ward Weller
It’s not that diamonds are a girl’s best friend, but it’s your best friends who are your diamonds. Gina Barreca
Friendship consists in forgetting what one gives and remembering what one receives. Alexandre Dumas
There is a reason why you are my best friend. Destiny. Almira Bastari
If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you. Joan Powers
Best friends are life’s truth tellers. T.J. Condon
Anybody can sympathize with the sufferings of a friend, but it requires a very fine nature to sympathize with a friend’s success. Oscar Wilde
Never let your best friends get lonely keep disturbing them. Candlelight Publications
I am always saying Glad to’ve met you to somebody I’m not at all glad I met. If you want to stay alive, you have to say that stuff, though. J.D. Salinger
A messy house is a must it separates your true friends from other friends. Real friends are there to visit you not your house! Jennifer Wilson
I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar, but I cherish the friend who for me does not consult his calendar. Robert Brault
True caring friends are a gift; be careful not to tear the wrapping when you open it. RJ Intindola
Friendship is the only cement that will ever hold the world together. Woodrow T. Wilson
My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me. Henry Ford
