50+ Best Funny Sports Quotes to Make You Laugh

Sport includes all forms of competitive physical activity or games which, through casual or organized participation, at least in part aim to use, maintain or improve physical ability and skills while providing enjoyment to participants, and in some cases, entertainment for spectators. Inspirational funny sports quotes will fire up your brain and inspire you to look at life differently while making you laugh.

If you’re searching for funny sayings and hilarious thanksgiving quotes that perfectly capture what you’d like to say or just want to feel inspired yourself, browse through an amazing collection of extremely funny soccer quotes, hilarious science quotes and funniest saturday quotes.

Famous Funny Sports Quotes

Wrestling is ballet with violence. Jesse Ventura

That awkward moment when you’re wearing Nike’s and you can’t do it. Unknown

The breakfast of champions is not cereal, it’s the opposition. Nick Seitz

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Serious sport is war minus the shooting. George Orwell

The NFL, like life, is full of idiots. Randy Cross

The most important thing about batting is getting the bat to hit the ball. Michael Holding

The reason women don’t play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public. Phyllis Diller

Baseball is like church. Many attend, few understand. Leo Durocher

If you make every game a life-and-death thing, you’re going to have problems. You’ll be dead a lot. Dean Smith

To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there’s no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other. Jack Handey

funny sports quotes

The fewer rules a coach has, the fewer rules there are for players to break. John Madden

If a tie is like kissing your sister, losing is like kissing your grandmother with her teeth out. George Brett

Just sports. Playing games versus playing – sports? Filmtwob

If practice makes perfect, and no one is perfect, why practice? Derek P.

Tennis and golf are best played, not watched. Roger Kahn

I think football would become an even better game if someone could invent a ball that kicks back. Eric Morecambe

Sports are the reason I am out of shape. I watch them all on TV. Thomas Sowell

It’s bad to get hit on your chin. Because it’s attached to your head. Rex Hudler

Playing polo is like trying to play golf during an earthquake. Sylvester Stallone

Baseball is like church. Many attend; few understand. Leo Durocher

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All hockey players are bilingual. They know English and profanity. Gordie Howe

Solo homers usually come with no one on base. Ralph Kinner

hilarious sports quotes

Amazing Funny Sports Quotes

Baseball is almost the only orderly thing in a very un-orderly world. If you get three strikes, even the best lawyer in the world can’t get you off. Bill Veeck

You win some, lose some, and wreck some. Dale Earnhardt

Tis not that rural sports alone invite, but all the grateful country breathes delight. John Gay

If you think it’s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. Jack Lemmon

One day of practice is like one day of clean living. It doesn’t do you any good. Abe Lemmons

The only way to prove that you’re a good sport is to lose. Ernie Banks

In order to start winning, we have to stop losing. Emmanuel Arceneaux

As the ball gets softer, it loses its hardness. Geoff Boycott

Baseball is the only field of endeavor where a man can succeed three times out of ten and be considered a good performer. Ted Williams

I don’t have any tricky plays, I’d rather have tricky players. Abe Lemons

If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. Erma Bombeck

Better teams win more often than the teams that are not so good. Tom Watt

I knew I had to win today, otherwise she would have beaten me. Heather Watson

If you can beat a team 6-5, you’re better off than losing 5-4. Casey Stengel

funniest sports quotes

We need the players, because without the players we wouldn’t have a team. Howard Wilkinson

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Baseball is 90% mental. The other half is physical. Yogi Berra

It’s hard to get a hit if you strike out. Larry Dieker

It’s a round ball and a round bat, and you got to hit it square. Pete Rose

The first half was even, the second half was even worse. Pat Spillane

Rugby is a beastly game played by gentlemen; soccer is a gentleman’s game played by beasts; football is a beastly game played by beasts. Henry Blaha

The rules of soccer are very simple, basically it is this: if it moves, kick it. If it doesn’t move, kick it until it does. Phil Woosnam

Losing is the great American sin. Jerome Holtzman

Football games turn on things that are done by players. Willie Miller

I’ve never lost a game I just ran out of time. Michael Jordan

The trouble with referees is that they know the rules, but they do not know the game. Bill Shankly

Pro football is like nuclear warfare. There are no winners, only survivors. Frank Gifford

I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators. Gerald R. Ford

I figure practice puts your brains in your muscles. Sam Snead

extremely funny sports quotes