53+ Best The Hangover Quotes: Exclusive Selection

The Hangover is a series of three American comedy films created by Jon Lucas and Scott Moore and directed by Todd Phillips. All three films follow the misadventures of a quartet of friends who go on their road trip to attend a bachelor party. Funniest The Hangover quotes will fire up your brain and encourage you to look at life differently while making you laugh.

If you’re searching for greatest movie quotes that perfectly capture what you’d like to say or just want to feel inspired yourself, browse through an amazing collection of inspiring Austin Powers quotes, best Office Space quotes and famous The Godfather quotes.

Most Hilarious Quotes From The Hangover

Laurent entered, an edge to his grace, like a leopard with a headache. C.S. Pacat

Hey, this is Phil. Leave me a message, or don’t, but do me a favor: don’t text me, it’s gay. Phil

Dixon was alive again. Consciousness was upon him before he could get out of the way; not for him the slow, gracious wandering from the halls of sleep, but a summary, forcible ejection. He lay sprawled, too wicked to move, spewed up like a broken spider crab on the tarry shingle of morning. The light did him harm, but not as much as looking at things did; he resolved, having done it once, never to move his eyeballs again. A dusty thudding in his head made the scene before him beat like a pulse. His mouth had been used as a latrine by some small creature of the night, and then as its mausoleum. During the night, too, he’d somehow been on a cross country run and then been expertly beaten up by secret police. He felt bad. Kingsley Amis

Not at the table, Carlos! Alan

Well, I drank enough to sustain a small Spanish village, I haven’t had an orgasm in a thousand years, and I will probably die old and alone in a beautifully designed apartment with all of Clive’s illegitimate children swarming around me. How do you think I feel? Alice Clayton

I didn’t know they gave out rings at the Holocaust. Alan

The sky was pure opal now. Oscar Wilde

Hey, Phil, am I missing a tooth? Stu

We are indeed drifting into the arena of the unwell. Bruce Robinson

Wow! You are the world’s shittiest drug dealer. Stu

How do I feel today? I feel as unfit as an unfiddle, And it is the result of a certain turbulence in the mind and an uncertain burbulence in the middle. What was it, anyway, that angry thing that flew at me? I am unused to banshees crying Boo at me. Your wife can’t be a banshee. Or can she? Ogden Nash

Oh wait, next weeks no good for me, the Jonas brothers are in town. Alan

At least he could turn on the shower, stand beneath the hot needles, face thrust near the spray head, feeling the headache move back a little. Annie Proulx

Oh, my God! Oh, my God! You just nailed the baby. Stu

Curse you, cheap beer. Must find miso in tiny packet. MCM

He’ll be fine. I cracked a window. Phil

The gears of narcissism propel the dictator and how tempting it is to shift them into overdrive while drunk on power. The genocidal hangover comes later. Stewart Stafford

Would you please put some pants on? I feel weird having to ask you twice. Phil

When Quoyle leaned forward the twin spears of the headache threatened to dislodge his eyes. Annie Proulx

It’s rock, paper, scissors. There’s nothing more fair. Phil

Every morning, my hangover feels like being born again. My head throbs, like being squeezed and pushed out, fists trembling, throat grunting and wailing in protest of the light, screaming for the comfort of warm, dark silence. Rasmenia Massoud

You know what, Doug? You should enjoy yourself because come Sunday you’re going to start dying, just a little bit, every day. Phil

Book hangovers are more fun than alcohol hangovers. They take you into a completely different world. They don’t numb the mind but open it to imagination and different perspectives to the reality. I knew many worlds better than reality and that they existed in books. Namrata Gupta

Would you shut up and drive before these nerds ask me another question? Phil

Jane admitted, I drank too much wine last night I know not how else to account for the shaking of my hand to day. Lucy Worsley

Jesus, he’s like a gremlin. Comes with instructions and shit. Phil

Tally really didn’t have the strength to explain that she’d really meant her hangover, which was sprawled in her head like an overweight cat, sullen and squishy and disinclined to budge. Scott Westerfeld

To a night the four of us will never forget! Phil

Ash, if you must play avenging angel, could you do it a bit quieter? I’ve got this awful headache. K.B. Rainwater

You know, I just have to say I have never seen a more beautiful, elegant, just regal creature. Phil

This can’t be the hangover that all the films talk about. It just can’t. It’s too terrible. If this is the result of drinking, then why would anyone bother? Lauren James

You are literally too stupid to insult. Stu

The hangovers are the price I pay. Each skull splitting excursion down my personal rabbit hole to hell is a guilt tinged reminder of every little fuckin’ thing I’ve ever done wrong and never made amends for. Dan Johnson

Phil, we’re not even going to be in the room. It’s one night, we can share beds. It’s no big deal. Stu

A hangover is the visceral reality of a price being extracted. Anne Gisleson

It’s The Weekend, Budnick. I Don’t Know You. You Do Not Exist. Phil

Michelle, still drowsy and dreamlike from the night before, flaunted her hangover like a heavy, jewel encrusted crown. Vivian Pham

Would You Please Put Some Pants On? I Feel Weird Having To Ask You Twice. Phil

Is it possible to get hungover from too much online love? A.D. Aliwat,

Hey, Guys, When’s The Next Halley’s Comet? Alan

The only cure for a headache is a hangover. Clifford Thurlow

And We’re The Three Best Friends That Anyone Could Have! Alan

We’ve reached that point in the night when we’re slinging more drinks than tacos, and the Frankenstein monsters on our menu which I’d created specifically for the inebriated are flooding the line. There’s the fried egg pork carnitas perfect for a pounding headache, and the barbacoa with bacon and refried beans that soaks up alcohol like a sponge. I watch as one of the waitresses carries out a stack of corn tortillas filled with tripas and potatoes smothered in queso blanco the holy grail of hangover remedies. Laekan Zea Kemp

What Do Tigers Dream Of, When They Take A Little Tiger Snooze? Stu

Gretchen walked by and saw Kendall and another waitress dipping fries in Armando’s garlic aioli and shoveling them into their mouths. This was the number one hangover food for the staff at Sullivan’s. The salt fixed everything. Jennifer Close

This Isn’t The Real Caesars Palace, Is It? Alan

Jean Rose poured a cup of the tomato and lemon concoction Ruth made for hangovers, gulping it back. Brooke Lea Foster

I Hate Godzilla! I Hate Him Too! Alan

It’s hard to cope when simultaneously drunk and hungover. Lily Chu

Hey Guys, You Ready To Let The Dogs Out? Alan

The movements of some more little red birds in the garden, like animated rosebuds, appeared unbearably jittery and thievish. It was as though the creatures were attached by sensitive wires to his nerves. Malcolm Lowry