She Let Go
She let go. Without a thought or a word, she let go.
She let go of fear. She let go of the judgments.
She let go of the confluence of opinions swarming around her head.
She let go of the committee of indecision within her.
She let go of all the ‘right’ reasons. Wholly and completely,
without hesitation or worry, she just let go.
She didn’t ask anyone for advice. She didn’t read a
book on how to let go… She didn’t search the scriptures.
She just let go.
She let go of all of the memories that held her back.
She let go of all of the anxiety that kept her from moving forward.
She let go of the planning and all of the calculations about how to do it just right.
She didn’t promise to let go.
She didn’t journal about it.
She didn’t write the projected date in her day-timer.
She made no public announcement and put no ad in the paper.
She didn’t check the weather report or read her daily horoscope.
She just let go.
She didn’t analyse whether she should let go.
She didn’t call her friends to discuss the matter.
She didn’t do a five-step Spiritual Mind Treatment.
She didn’t call the prayer line.
She didn’t utter one word. She just let go.
No one was around when it happened.
There was no applause or congratulations.
No one thanked her or praised her.
No one noticed a thing.
Like a leaf falling from a tree, she just let go.
There was no effort. There was no struggle.
It wasn’t good and it wasn’t bad.
It was what it was, and it is just that.
In the space of letting go, she let it all be.
A small smile came over her face.
A light breeze blew through her.
And the sun and the moon shone forevermore.
– Rev. Safire Rose.
Why is it so difficult to let go of our fears? How much easier life would be if we dared to go ahead and we would not worry about everything. You should let go of your fears, not stick to them. It is difficult to know what belongs to you, as you often do not even realize that you have adopted something, and at the same time, you consider things as your reality which have nothing to do with reality. Notice what does not belong to you, that is holding you back and eliminate it from your life; do not let it slow you down.
Here’s a life-transforming secret: that seemingly scary condition, whatever it may be, is not the problem. It is your reaction that is fearful. This is why if you will become conscious of your condition instead of afraid of it, you will change forever your relationship with fear.
The following ways help me each and every time I would like to conquer my fears.
- Take time out.
One symptom of too much fear or anxiety is not being able to think clearly. The first thing to do is take time out so you can physically calm down.
Distract yourself from the worry for 15 minutes by walking around the block, making a cup of tea or having a bath.
- Face your fears.
If you have the courage to write them down, you are halfway there.
Lot of fears are eating us from the inside, and we are so used to them that we don’t even realize they exist. They are hidden in our words and in our beliefs. We have made them part of our lives, but remember: you shouldn’t stick to your fears, you should let them go.
- Deeper into your fears.
Write down the main areas of your life and make lists of your blockages. This task will help you dig even deeper into your fears. I know, you still say that this task is not for you, but if you follow the five steps, you will soon realize it is only your ego tricking you. From your job to you career and to your relationships, take a look at the things that might hold you back. Think of the reasons why you are not taking certain steps.
Get specific about what exactly you’re afraid of. Look at the pictures you have in your head about the situation. What is happening in them? What are you really scared of? Become an observer of your inner space.
- Look at the evidence.
Now that you have a list of your fears, deal with them one by one. Why are you afraid of it?
The attitude and the experience you associate with the specific events are important. If in your case it is negative, you only have to change that.
Get curious about what thoughts generate your fear, where do you feel the fear, and how do you react to it? Again, be an observer of what is going on.
- Practice engaging with the fear.
The power to label your emotions is beneficial for self-understanding and emotional intelligence. It also appears that engaging with a fear and verbalizing your fear has incredible power to help you overcome fears and regulate emotions.
- Don’t try to be perfect.
Life is full of stresses, yet many of us feel that our lives must be perfect. Bad days and setbacks will always happen, and it’s important to remember that life is messy.
- Visualise a happy place.
Whenever fear strikes, flip it over.
Take a moment to close your eyes and imagine a place of safety and calm. It could be a picture of you walking on a beautiful beach, or snuggled up in bed with the cat next to you, or a happy memory from childhood. Let the positive feelings soothe you until you feel more relaxed. You should have your “Things that Make Me Happy” list.
- Talk about it.
Sharing fears takes away a lot of their scariness. If you can’t talk to a partner, friend or family member, call a helpline. If your fears aren’t going away, you can ask your GP for help. GPs can refer people for counselling psychotherapy or help through an online mental health service, such as FearFighter.
Whenever you feel fear, switch it over to what you are grateful for instead. If you’re afraid of public speaking, be grateful for the opportunity to communicate with so many people, and that they are there to genuinely listen to what you have to say.