What is the idea of marriage ?
This question has been haunting me from some years when for the first time, i was asked to get ready for the same.
They said ”its time” , she is ”good”. Unfortunately, I was just 17 at that time. So, i had no idea what actually is happening.. People saw me, raised their eyebrows and went away..
I was against the terms and condition of the society..
I was ‘dark’ against the fairness rule and ‘fat’ against the slim rule
If i say that phase of putting me down for every pointless idea turned out to be the best turning point of my life.. I guess everyone might find it absurd. But that’s how exactly it turned out to be. My whole point of view about marriage, about a person and most importantly about myself changed beautifully and i really mean it.
They say you can’t understand a person even if you spend whole life with them. And that’s true.
But you can always learn little more about them today than you did yesterday.
And that’s how it is, i know myself a little bit more than i did yesterday.. And that’s not cause i have been given all the best moments to be happy about.
Believe me the best learning comes from the worst moments you face. When last summer, i went to this place called delhi..
I unknowingly changed a lot more mentally than physically.. I saw people strong, weak, crazy and different from me. The understanding about the thing that everyone has a different story and just because its different from you doesn’t make itl less valuable or tough.
And how is it all related to my own confusion about marriage is a funny thing. I always had this idea that educated person would always turn out to be the best one you hope for. And i thought living among those who would not understand what actually i feel about marriage is hard.
But i got to know, no one actually has an idea..
Big cities also have people completed messed up. Same stories with different characters. The differece is of the pace, the pace of life is fast in a bigger place and do people move on.. People tend to be more realistic than ever.
Luckily, i came across various kind of persons in last some months who helped me understand the marriage better.
Some actually thought they would be loving to have a partner open minded and understanding.. But at the same time were against the idea of partner being non-virgin or the one who came out easy. Some loved doing mischievous things themselves but for a marriage they thought of a pure partner. Sex is part of marriage and it needs a purest of its kind but at the same time what’s wrong for a little fun anyway. Hypocrisy??
Maybe yes! Maybe no..
What i felt in the due course, is,after a certain point of time. You confine yourself to limited kind of persons, at 17, i am sure most of my friends knew how am i doing in my life. But at 22 now, no one actually have a perfect idea about how messed up or completely fine life it is. And that’s how you grow in relationship too, when you are young and you adore yourself.. You try let everyone know how adorable you are.. But at some point when you are confined to a single person or about to go for marriage commitment, you let yourself to become ‘treasure’ for the special one.
When i was rejected by number of persons on various grounds, it struck me hard. And i am not changed yet. I am still dusky and fat. But today i know, when the time comes.. Someone would still love to treasure me no matter how indifferent i look from the eyes of the society.
I have grown to become a girl of my own choices and its not wrong always.. When you choose to flirt or do mischiefs or when you choose to do mistakes or when you choose to confine yourself to a few people or you choose to be a little more different.
Coz, Trust me at that moment only you choose to be little more happy than others.
And my idea of marriage is still not defined but oneday i will sure get what actually it feels to be in it anyway.
Coz at the end,
YOU ARE ”REALITY” FOR A FEW ONLY AND FOR THE REST MERE “ILLUSION “