Hi, My name is Krissy.
As I write this, I am wearing an old pair of jeans that I got at a second hand clothing store, and they’re not exactly clean. On the top half of my body, I am wearing an even older sweatshirt, and nothing else. I haven’t showered yet today. It is 9:37PM.
I am about to eat a bowl of Spicy Chicken Mr. Noodles. I smoke. I occasionally smoke marijuana. My favorite food is grilled cheese. My least favorite food is broccoli. My favorite TV show is South Park. My favorite word is four-lettered. So is my second favorite word. And third favorite, honestly.
My fourth favorite is actually something decent though; today, I’d have to say it’s “warrior”. Not in the typical, “look how bada** I am” sense, but in the loving warrior sense. It is one of several ideals I now push myself towards.
Which brings me nicely to the point of my (first) post here; nothing about me is particularly warrior-like, at first appearance, or Divine. But I am both of those things. And so are you. Though in moments like this, my Mr. Noodle moments, it’s very easy to forget.
For many years, I’ve struggled with low self-worth; it’s a hole I’m only now digging myself out of. Along with positive affirmations that I repeat daily, (both out loud and in writing) I’ve been making the choice lately to trust and accept that things are going well for me, and ever-improving. And as a believer/worshipper of the Divine Feminine, I have chosen to believe that I, along with everyone else, is carrying a part of Her energy. Her divinity.
I don’t bring this up in an effort to try to convert anyone else to my way of thinking, and whatever anyone chooses to believe about themselves, and their world, is valid so long as it makes them happy and doesn’t hurt anybody.
The reason I bring it up is this: lately, if I am down, it is helpful to me to remind myself of this, that I am a partly Divine Being because I am Hers. Looking at others in this light is also helpful, especially when I’m angry. I can say to myself, “okay, I don’t like this person, but they’re Hers too, and on their own path. They are, in a subtle sense, my brother/sister. Relax.”
But sometimes this isn’t enough, obviously. To make me feel better about myself, or others I mean. So here’s an idea I’ve had, and I’m going to try it here, now, for the first time, because I’m feeling a little down and could use the pick-me-up. I encourage you, whether you are a Goddess-worshipper like me, or a Christian, or an atheist, or whatever, to try it with me now.
List 5 positive personality traits you associate with divinity, or the idea of divinity, in general. Here’s mine:
Now, since you are Divine like me (or for the atheists out there, if you were a Divine being), in what way could you say you’ve demonstrated those abilities? Either in the last 24 hours, the last week, your whole life, whatever.
– I have been trying my best to be supportive to my best friend right now, while she’s going through some rough stuff with her ex.
– I bought snacks for the Mother while at the store, for her altar, even though I don’t have a lot of money. I make a point of trying to praise people I talk to, whenever I can, to try to help them feel good about themselves. I am going to be donating some furniture, DVDs, and dishes to the Canadian Diabetes association later this week.
-When people ask me my opinion on something, or for advice, I always try to give them the most honest answer I can, but in the kindest way possible. I did this earlier today with my best friend. I spent a great deal of time today worrying I wasn’t nice enough to the old people who kept slowing me down at the grocery store earlier, and mentally thanked them for contributing to the economy by shopping, and congratulated them for still being able to do so themselves despite their advanced age.
-I am nowhere near wise; however, I AM consistently working on gaining more knowledge and experience. I am in Priestess training which I put a lot of my energy into; in my free time, I am reading/working through exercise books on trance meditation & self love, and studying a book on symbolism in historical and present-day Goddess artwork. I strive to improve.
-I was honest with myself earlier today when I did not live up to the standards I set for myself, I did not criticize myself, but instead changed what I was doing. When I do this in a way that involves others, I always try to apologize, if appropriate/possible, or at least improve my behavior consciously from that point on.
These are the ways my divinity is/has manifested right about now. They are nothing special, but they are mine. And I allow myself to feel pleased about that.
And I would love to hear yours.
**If you liked this, please consider checking out my site femininejourneys.wordpress.com. It’s a work in progress. :)**