38+ Best Russell Brand Quotes: Exclusive Selection

Russell Edward Brand is an English comedian, actor, radio host, writer, and activist. After beginning his career as a comedian and later becoming an MTV presenter, Brand first achieved renown in 2004 as the host of Big Brother’s Big Mouth, a Big Brother spin-off. Profoundly inspirational Russell Brand quotes will brighten up your day and make you feel ready to take on anything.

If you’re searching for great quotes by comedians that perfectly capture what you’d like to say or just want to feel inspired yourself, browse through an amazing collection of famous Trevor Noah quotes, famous Chris Farley quotes and greatest John Witherspoon quotes.

Famous Russell Brand Quotes

The bad-boy label is just an assumption. — Russell Brand

When you bump into your own mom at an orgy, it’s hard not to get her to read into certain things. — Russell Brand

It’s difficult to believe in yourself because the idea of self is an artificial construction. You are, in fact, part of the glorious oneness of the universe. Everything beautiful in the world is within you. — Russell Brand

And while we’re on the subject of ducks, which we plainly are, the story, ‘The Ugly Duckling’ ought be banned as the central character wasn’t a duckling or he wouldn’t have grown up into a swan. He was a cygnet. — Russell Brand

As a person I’m a little more doubtful, introspective and analytical. — Russell Brand

I keep hearing in my head you are the Messiah, you are the Messiah. I think there’s something wrong with my headphones. — Russell Brand

If anybody needs any help with anything, I’m prepared to help. — Russell Brand

Honesty has always been an integral part of my operation, really. — Russell Brand

Even in name, he seems like a Victorian oddity. Igor, fetch ‘the Crouch’ from the catacombs, we’re going to the graveyard. — Russell Brand

I enjoyed having a reputation as being wild, but these days I try not to worry about what people think in the privacy of their own brain or what they write in the bizarre publicity of their own newspapers, because all of those things are meaningless. — Russell Brand

I’m a vegetarian. I believe that we’re all equal. I ain’t got no right to kill. Say a fly comes in my house, I tolerate that little ahole. — Russell Brand I get fixated when I’m bleeding — I can see why they went in for blood-letting in the medieval times because it makes you feel a bit better. When I cut myself, the drama of it calms me down. — Russell Brand Surfing should be called foam-choking or sea stabbing. — Russell Brand No one shuts their laptop after looking at pornography and says, ‘What a productive time I just spent connecting with the world!’ — Russell Brand It seems to me that actual democracy is where all of us get to participate and it’s not just a sort of a blunt little dry hump in a ballot box, but an actual penetrative process. — Russell Brand Some people were just getting on with their lives, chatting, being young. It simply wouldn’t do. — Russell Brand We continue to be spilled on by consumerism even though we know it doesn’t make us happy. — Russell Brand There was [really] little difference between someone acting throwing french fries in your face and someone throwing french fries in your face. — Russell Brand Anyone who’s been poor and gets rich is stalked by guilt and fear. Guilt because you know it isn’t fair, that life hasn’t changed for everyone — Russell Brand If your body is 90% water what have you got to drink water all the time for? Why can’t you just have some crisps? — Russell Brand The world isn’t made of atoms, it’s made of stories. — Russell Brand I’ve always been a ‘your parents have got to come up to the school’ type of person. Even now, when I do something wrong – if I say something inappropriate on a live tv show, for example – I half expect to have to deliver a note to Barbara Brand: ‘Please come up to Channel 4 head office, Russell’s done something despicable. — Russell Brand Total revolution of consciousness and our entire social, political and economic system is what interests me, but that’s not on the ballot. — Russell Brand One of the great sadnesses of modern life, because of our disenfranchisement and disillusionment with religion, is that we don’t have access to these ideas. Yoga and meditation, for me, is a way of, in this secular world, accessing very very beautiful principles that would perhaps make us happier, at a time when people feel disillusioned with the economy, concerned about the ecology, worried with politicians, and don’t trust what they’re being told on television. — Russell Brand My mum brought me up on her own. All we really had was each other. — Russell Brand Every moment is a fresh new beginning… a wonderful inauguration of the great cosmic journey through the Universe. We can do whatever we want. We can change reality at any moment. — Russell Brand I’m not better than you; I’m just different than you in a way that’s better. — Russell Brand Fear travels fast. Love travels a little more slowly. Rationale takes a little more consideration. — Russell Brand People have always said, are you gay? I’ve had a lot of that. But it’s just not in me. I really like women a lot; I’m repulsed by men sexually. — Russell Brand The Holy Spirit ain’t got a pen. — Russell Brand How long is it polite to continue to be interested in what someone says after they reveal they’ve got a boyfriend? — Russell Brand What I liked about it is in the world of children, there are very, very different rules and a kind of naivete and innocence and sweetness that’s been beautifully captured, I think, by this film as you can even see [gesturing toward the film’s poster on display nearby] from this gorgeous artwork. — Russell Brand The utilities and facilities of major corporations can be confiscated and given to democratic collectives — Russell Brand I think all of us are living in denial of our spiritual nature as we continue to participate in the material world even though we know we’re destroying the planet we live on. — Russell Brand Consciousness exists beyond your head, between our heads, and it can manifest harmony. — Russell Brand Love is the one thing we’re capable of perceiving that transcends time and space. — Russell Brand Imagine the wisdom to be passed down from the classical Buddhist texts. — Russell Brand Im happy to be a part of the conversation, if more young people are talking about fracking instead of twerking were heading in the right direction. The people that govern us dont want an active population who are politically engaged, they want passive consumers distracted by the spectacle of which I accept I am a part. — Russell Brand For me happiness occurs arbitrarily: a moment of eye contact on a bus, where all at once you fall in love; or a frozen second in a park where it’s enough that there are trees in the world. — Russell Brand I’ve always had this impulse to be destructive. — Russell Brand What was alien was being ordinary, being humdrum, being trapped into appeasing…having to crush and stifle my opinions, not being allowed to be brilliant, tricking myself into mediocrity. — Russell Brand Tumbling into a dark, Lewis Carroll labyrinth of filth, pursuing a white rabbit of smut! — Russell Brand The economy is just a metaphorical device, it’s not real. That’s why it’s got the word con in it. — Russell Brand All penguins are the same below the surface, which I think is as perfect an analogy as we’re likely to get for the futility of racism. — Russell Brand Amy Winehouse – her surname’s beginning to sound like a description of her liver. — Russell Brand It doesn’t matter how many pairs of shoes you have, how many cars you have, etc…. It’s all utterly meaningless and yet we continue to pursue this. Why? Because they’ve learned they can stimulate our primal desires through selling us products. — Russell Brand It would have been convenient to be gay. Just because of the grooming, the narcissism, stuff like that. But I have this kind of roaring heterosexuality. Traditional, uncomplicated heterosexuality, an almost cliched Robin Askwith thing. — Russell Brand I’m famous now. But now that I’ve got fame and some of the other things I thought would make me happy – it ain’t worked — Russell Brand I really, really love children and I think probably among children is when I feel mostly berated. It’s not like I feel like oh, there’s some children here. I have to tone it down. I go nuts with children especially when I ain’t got none. So when I’m round my mates’ children, I jest them kids up first. I swear at them, I get more worked up, I say crazy stuff to them, fill their heads with nonsense and then I leave them. — Russell Brand Imagining the overthrow of the current political system is the only way I can be enthused about politics. — Russell Brand Strength does not have to be belligerent and loud. — Russell Brand All we can do is adapt the way we view this condition, not as a crime or a romantic affectation but as a disease that will kill. We need to review the way society treats addicts, not as criminals but as sick people in need of care. — Russell Brand Life’s never a postcard of life, is it? It never feels like how you’d want it to look. — Russell Brand I do transcendental meditation, which is, I suppose, derived from Vedic or Ayurvedic principles, which is sort of Hindu principles. — Russell Brand If you’re a drug addict, often you’re stealing – I’ve gotten done for shoplifting a few times. — Russell Brand Then, of course, through the umbilical link we all tumble backwards down the spiralling DNA staircase to one common ancestor in Africa, and before that some bunch of curious monkeys. Down and down we go unto the sea, unto the dust, the single cellular dust. What impulse drove one cell to become two? What yearning pulled the fish on to the land? What caused apes to walk upright? Some invisible magnetic pull. Is there a difference between attraction and intention? Where is evolution taking us? — Russell Brand I don’t know if this is the kind of retrospective analysis that people are fond of applying to their work or actions, but it feels like I knew I was going to be famous and I knew that an element of that would be traumatic, so that if I could make myself something big and otherworldly, it would be a kind of defence. — Russell Brand I also quite like to be recognized by children; I find it sweet. — Russell Brand I think that there is an infinite creative force that generates all consciousness and all matter and we are all connected and if you align yourself with this infinite creative force then you can be positive and you can be beautiful, I don’t think its a person or god, I don’t believe in any particular doctrine or dogma, only that humanity is connected. — Russell Brand I’m into yoga, I meditate all the time, I’m vegetarian. — Russell Brand On respect for the Queen: When I lick a stamp I always do it with my eyes closed. — Russell Brand Sometimes, as a comedian, a line will come to you, that is so beautiful, so perfect, that you think: I did not create this line. This line belongs to all of us. Surely this is a line of God — Russell Brand People don’t throw your bags out of windows because of lies; they throw them out because of the truth. — Russell Brand When I was growing up, I thought I’d be a lot happier if I was famous and successful and if I had money. — Russell Brand Even as a junkie I stayed true [to vegetarianism] – ‘I shall have heroin, but I shan’t have a hamburger.’ What a sexy little paradox. — Russell Brand I also do a lot of Kundalini yoga. — Russell Brand You shouldn’t eat animals, it’s mean to them, — Russell Brand People do this a lot. They don’t seem to realise that the future is just like now, but in a little while, so they say they’re going to do things in anticipation of some kind of seismic shift in their worldview that never actually materializes. But everything’s not going to be made of leather, the world won’t stink of sherbet. Tomorrow is not some mythical kingdom where you’ll grow butterfly wings and be able to talk to animals — you’ll basically feel pretty much the same way you do at the moment. — Russell Brand What should happen is a little voice in your head, like Jimmy Cricket in Pinocchio, will go ‘But Russell, that bird, that’s a creature like you, if you kill it it’ll be all sad’ and you go ‘F*, alright. I won’t kill it then.’ — Russell Brand

It’s no wonder Bob Geldof knows so much about famine – he’s been dining out on I Don’t Like Mondays for 30 years, — Russell Brand

In England, we have such good manners that if someone says something impolite, the police will get involved. — Russell Brand

There’s an interconnectivity between what’s in the consciousness of cat and what’s in the consciousness of us. — Russell Brand

Over the road there was a church: a modern gray building, which constantly played a recording of church bells. Strange it was. Why no proper bells? I never went in but I bet it was a robot church for androids, where the Bible was in binary and their Jesus had laser eyes and metal claws. — Russell Brand

When you’re married, it’s one person. That’s one more than a monk. It’s not that different. — Russell Brand

I know that’s the sort of thing people say and I really hate it when people say the sort of things people say. I always think, ‘You don’t mean that, you just think it sounds good. — Russell Brand

As a performer, I’m very, very confident in what I do. — Russell Brand

No-one really feels self-confident deep down because it’s an artificial idea. Really, people aren’t that worried about what you’re doing or what you’re saying, so you can drift around the world relatively anonymously: you must not feel persecuted and examined. Liberate yourself from that idea that people are watching you. — Russell Brand

The right to free speech is important but it isn’t as important as ‘we’re all human beings together, let’s find solutions together.’ — Russell Brand

If people associate you with the idea of loads of money, they in turn will give some of that money to you. — Russell Brand

When I first became famous in the United Kingdom it was helpful because it meant there wasn’t a spite of ‘this bloke’s a drug addict,’ ‘this bloke fks all these women’ because I was just making jokes about all those things already, so it made me some kind of incorruptible indefatigable, indestructible force. — Russell Brand Today’s ‘Sesame Street’ will NOT be brought to you by the number 34 or the letter D. — Russell Brand Revolt in whatever way we want, with the spontaneity of the London rioters, with the certainty and willingness to die of religious fundamentalists or with the twinkling mischief of the trickster… Take to the streets, together, with the understanding that the feeling that you aren’t being heard or seen or represented isn’t psychosis; it’s government policy. — Russell Brand If you strip away self-effacement, charm and the spirit of mischief-qualities that make determination and ambition tolerable- you’re left with a right arhole. — Russell Brand

I don’t mind having a reputation as a serious and spiritual person. I think that would be a nice reputation to have — Russell Brand

Don’t listen to me. I’m a maniac, but the voice in your head, ask it Is it right to kill 200 million animals simply for fun?. What did it say? Right. There you go. — Russell Brand

Sometimes when we’re incensed by the rancid tide of injustice, the impulse is to attack. We must avoid this. We have learned that violence as a means is always unsuccessful. — Russell Brand

I recognize that I have the ability to be selfish, but I also recognize that you can’t be happy if you only care about yourself at the expense of other people. — Russell Brand

Democracy is a gleaming Excalibur – let’s not use it just to mend the toaster. — Russell Brand

If you’re a drug addict, then you’ve always got drugs, so you’re a criminal. So you’re gonna get into problems. — Russell Brand

People don’t realize that the future is just now, but later. — Russell Brand

As a producer, you’ve got to be involved in helping out with solving problems. — Russell Brand

I do have a regard for the musicality of language that came from BBC sitcoms like ‘Fawlty Towers.’ — Russell Brand

Since Steve Jobs died I cannot bear to see anyone use an iPhone irreverently, what I did was a tribute to his memory. — Russell Brand

It was crushingly disappointing as a fan of The Simpsons to discover that it’s just you in a room speaking into a microphone. I thought I was going to become friends with Homer Simpson, but unfortunately none of them are real. — Russell Brand

I used to binge-eat and make myself throw up. I was a fat kid. Obviously I didn’t quite master the bulimia. — Russell Brand

The more people who have access to this vital information the better society will be. — Russell Brand

Eventually, I think you find a spiritual and emotional connection with someone, and I think it unifies you with everyone else. I think if you love one person, it makes you love everyone… — Russell Brand

A Halloween-haired, Sachsgate-enacting, estuary-whining, glitter-lacquered, priapic berk How dare I, from my velvet chaise longue, in my Hollywood home like Kubla Khan, drag my limbs from my harem to moan about the system? A system that has posited me on a lilo made of thighs in an ocean filled with honey and foie gras’d my Essex arse with undue praise and money. — Russell Brand

Managing wildlife? It’s wild! It don’t need managing, leave it alone. — Russell Brand

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