67+ Best Santa Quotes: Exclusive Selection

Profoundly inspirational Santa quotes will challenge the way you think, and make your life worth living.

Famous Santa Quotes

Alas! How dreary would the world be if there was no Santa Claus! There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make this existence tolerable. Francis P. Church

There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa Claus; he does not believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus. Bob Phillips

You better watch out, you better not cry, better not pout, I’m telling you why Santa Claus is coming to town. Haven Gillespie

Christmas: the only time of year you can sit in front of a dead tree eating candy out of socks.

Whenever anyone was unselfish, that was Santa Claus. Christmas Eve was the time when everybody was unselfish. On that one night, Santa Claus was everywhere, because everybody, all together, stopped being selfish and wanted other people to be happy. And in the morning you saw what that had done. Laura Ingalls Wilder

Holiday lights should be festive while at the same time not encouraging aircraft to land. Charles Lake on Twitter

You know you’re getting old when Santa starts looking younger. Robert Paul

How can you not love eggnog? You’re basically getting wasted on ice cream. Bill Maher

To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas. Calvin Coolidge

I’m releasing a holiday song called, All I Want for Christmas is my Parents’ Freaking Wifi Password. Damien Fahey on Twitter

The greatest thing is not to believe in Santa Claus; it is to be Santa Claus. Pat Boone

Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip. Gary Allan

In this age of instant coffee, overnight rush deliveries, and 30-second media sound bites, it’s not surprising that children have discovered that their letters to Santa Claus can be sent by email. Patrick Flaherty

Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live. Dennis Miller

For me growing up, Christmas time was always the most fantastic, exciting time of year, and you’d stay up until three in the morning. You’d hear the parents wrapping in the other room but you knew that also, maybe, they were in collusion with Santa Claus. Chris Pine

All I want for Christmas is for my family to stop trying to talk to me while I’m trying to tweet. Robin Wood on Twitter

Seeing is believing, but sometimes the most real things in the world are the things we can’t see. The Conductor from The Polar Express

The office Christmas party is a great opportunity to catch up with people you haven’t seen for 20 minutes. Julius Sharpe

May you never be too grown up to search the skies on Christmas Eve.

Three Wise WOMEN would have asked directions, arrived on time, helped deliver the baby, bought practical gifts, cleaned the stable, made a casserole, and there would be peace on earth

Never deny the babies their Christmas! It is the shining seal set upon, a year of happiness. Let them believe in Santa Claus, or St. Nicholas; or Kriss Kringle, or whatever name the jolly Dutch saint bears in your religion. Mary Virginia Terhune

What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.

Bells are ringing, children are singing, all is merry and bright. So hang your stockings and say your prayers, ’cause Santa Claus comes tonight. Gene Autry

Which of Santa’s reindeers needs to mind his manners the most? Rudolph

Gifts of time and love are surely the basic ingredients of a truly merry Christmas. Peg Bracken

Anyone who believes that men are the equal of women has never seen a man trying to wrap a Christmas present

God put Santa Claus on earth to remind us that Christmas is ‘sposed to be a happy time. Bil Keane

At Christmas, tea is compulsory. Relatives are optional. Robert Godden

I believe, I believe, it’s silly, but I believe. Susan Walker from Miracle on 34th Street

Bloody Christmas, here again, let us raise a loving cup, peace on earth, goodwill to men, and make them do the washing up. Wendy Cope

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, in hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there. Clement Clarke Moore

Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard. Andy Borowitz

It’s all fun and games until Santa checks the naughty list.

Christmas is a time when you get homesick, even when you’re home.Carol  Nelson

An ounce of goodness every day, can soothe the heart in many ways. An ounce of goodness just because,’ don’t wait until Christmas to be Santa Claus. Charmaine J. Forde

Christmas is the season when you buy this year’s gifts with next year’s money.

All the world is happy when Santa Claus comes. Maud McKnight Lindsay

Christmas Shopping: Wouldn’t it be wonderful to find one gift that you didn’t have to dust, that had to be used right away, that was practical, fit everyone, was personal and would be remembered for a long time? I penciled in Gift certificate for a flu shot. Erma Bombeck

Seeing isn’t believing. Believing is seeing. Judy the Elf from The Santa Clause

Did you ever notice that life seems to follow certain patterns? Like I noticed that every year around this time, I hear Christmas music. Tom Sims

He doesn’t care if you’re rich or poor, he loves you just the same. Santa Claus knows we’re all God’s children, that makes everything right. Gene Autry

I love Christmas. I receive a lot of wonderful presents I can’t wait to exchange. Henny Youngman

Santa Claus had the right idea. Visit people only once a year. Victor Borge

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph.  Shirley Temple

Santa Claus is anyone who loves another and seeks to make them happy; who gives himself by thought or word or deed in every gift that he bestows; who shares his joys with those who are sad; whose hand is never closed against the needy; whose arm is ever outstretched to aid the weak; whose sympathy is quick and genuine in time of trouble; who recognizes a comrade and brother in every man he meets upon life’s common road; who lives his life throughout the entire year in the Christmas spirit. Edwin Osgood Grover

Let me see if I’ve got this Santa business straight. You say he wears a beard, has no discernible source of income and flies to cities all over the world under cover of darkness? You sure this guy isn’t laundering illegal drug money? Tom Armstrong

Whenever you give someone a present or sing a holiday song, you’re helping Santa Claus. To me, that’s what Christmas is all about. Helping Santa Claus! Louis Sachar

Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas. Johnny Carson

Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. Francis P. Church

My husband’s idea of getting the Christmas spirit is to become Scrooge. Melanie White

On Christmas Eve, many years ago, I lay quietly in my bed. I did not rustle the sheets. I breathed slowly and silently. I was listening for a sound I was afraid I’d never hear. The ringing bells of Santa’s sleigh. Hero Boy Chris from The Polar Express

Nothing’s as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. Kin Hubbard

Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies! Francis P. Church

People are so worried about what they eat between Christmas and the New Year, but they really should be worried about what they eat between the New Year and Christmas.

I still believe in Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy and true love. Don’t even try to tell me different. Dolly Parton

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year.

Oh, Christmas isn’t just a day, it’s a frame of mind. Kris Kringle from Miracle on 34th Street

The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn’t for any religious reasons. They couldn’t find three wise men and a virgin. Jay Leno

Believe in love. Believe in magic. Hell, believe in Santa Claus. Believe in others. Believe in yourself. Believe in your dreams. If you don’t, who will? Jon Bon Jovi

The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other. Johnny Carson

The name is Bond Santa Bond. I’ll have an eggnog, shaken, not stirred. Michael Scott from The Office

There are some people who want to throw their arms round you simply because it is Christmas; there are other people who want to strangle you simply because it is Christmas Robert Staughton Lynd

This bell is a wonderful symbol of the spirit of Christmas, as am I. Just remember, the true spirit of Christmas lies in your heart. Santa Claus from The Polar Express

What I don’t like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day. Phyllis Diller

The myth of Santa Claus is a wonderful way to convey a sense of universal love to children. Just because there isn’t a real person called Santa Claus with a long white beard doesn’t mean that sharing this myth with children is bad. It has a sense of wonder that fits our dreams and hopes. It conveys a sense of love, caring, and joy that both children and adults cherish. Robert Blake

I hate the radio this time of year because they play ‘All I Want for Christmas is You’ like, every other song. And that’s just not enough. Bridger Winegar