Elizabeth Stamatina “Tina” Fey is an American actress, comedian, writer, producer, and playwright. Profoundly inspirational Tina Fey quotes will challenge the way you think, and make your life worth living.
If you’re searching for famous comedy quotes that perfectly capture what you’d like to say or just want to feel inspired yourself, browse through an amazing collection of quotes by Erma Bombeck, best Jack Handey quotes and greatest Terry Pratchett quotes.
Famous Tina Fey Quotes
In my youth, I washed daily with Ivory soap and Prell shampoo. Everyone knew Prell was the best shampoo because you could also use it to clean a frying pan.
I am constantly amazed by Tina Fey. And I am Tina Fey.
It will never be perfect but perfect is overrated. Perfect is boring.
I was a little excited but mostly BLORFT. ‘BLORFT’ is an adjective that I just made up that means completely overwhelmed but proceeding as if everything is fine and reacting to the stress with the torpor of a possum.
[…] the music seems creepy, like when children sing in a horror movie.
My ability to turn good news into anxiety is rivaled only by my ability to turn anxiety into chin acne.
How could they possibly know if I’m a good mother? How can any of us know until the kid is about thirty-three and all the personality dust has really settled?
That feeling of ‘I’m pretty sure this next step is wrong, but I’m just gonna do it anyway’ is part of the same set of instincts that makes me such a great cook.
When actors are too good-looking, I can’t memorize them. For example, I have never seen a picture of Sienna Miller where I didn’t say, ‘That girl’s pretty. Who is that?’
‘Defective’ was a big word in our house. Many things were labeled ‘defective’ only to miraculously turn functional once the directions had been read more thoroughly.
If you retain nothing else, always remember the most important rule of beauty, which is: who cares?
Maybe we women gravitate toward comedy because it is a socially acceptable way to break rules and a release from our daily life
The topic of working moms is a tap-dance recital in a minefield.
Don’t waste your energy on trying to change opinions.
The sketch should lead the cutting pattern, which is to say content should dictate style, which is to say that in TV the writer is king.
THERE ARE NO MISTAKES, only opportunities.
Ladies gotta say no to their husbands at the movies. They gotta say: No, we are watching back-to-back cancer movies. And then this movie about a cat.
It’s like being a little kid again, parading around in a nightgown tucked into your underpants, believing it looks terrific.
In an attempt to make things easier for myself, which is the basis for all of history’s worst decisions.
This is one of the weird things about motherhood. You can predict that some of your best moments will happen around the toilet at six am while you’re holding a pile of fingernail clipping like a Santeria priestess.
I think women dress for other women to let them know what their deal is.
May she play the drums to the fiery rhythm of her own heart
Anyone who knows me will tell you that I am all about money. I mean, just look how well my line of zodiac-inspired toe rings and homeopathic children’s medications are selling on Home Shopping Network.
53.What’s that you say? None of them want that? You are correct. So I spent four years attempting to charm the uninterested.
Someone should do a study of the human brain and how quickly it can adjust to luxury.
I am unstoppable because I don’t know how to stop.
Thomas Jefferson – another gorgeous white boy who would not have been interested in me.
It’s no more dangerous to society than a radio broadcast of The War of the Worlds.
Do your thing and don’t care if they like it.
Harvard is Classical Military Theory, Improv is Vietnam.
Researches reported that they developed a self-healing plastic that repairs itself if cracked. The plastic will change the way airplanes are built and medicine is practiced. In a related story, Joan Rivers will never die.
I went back outside and manually released my butt cheeks.
Inspirational Tina Fey Quotes
To say I am an overrated troll when you have never seen me guard a bridge, is patently unfair.
Donna was an enigma wrapped in bacon wrapped in a crescent roll.
Some people say, ‘Never let them see you cry.’ I say, if you’re so mad you could just cry, then cry. It terrifies everyone.
In my limited experience, shows are like children. You can teach them manners and dress them in little sailor suits, but in the end, they’re going to be who they’re going to be.
It’s a burden, being able to control situations with my hyper-vigilance, but it’s my lot in life.
Your initiations are worthwhile.
You can’t be that kid standing at the top of the water slide. Overthinking it. You have to go down the chute.
[…] when you are in charge. Don’t hire the people who were jerky to you.
In a study, scientists report that drinking beer can be good for the liver. I’m sorry, did I say ‘scientists’? I meant ‘Irish people’.
How can I give her what Don Fey gave me? The gift of anxiety. The fear of getting in trouble. The knowledge that while you are loved, you are not above the law.
When I first set out to ruin SNL, I didn’t think anyone would notice, but I persevered because like you trying to a do a nine-piece jigsaw puzzle, it was a labor of love.
I never dreamed I would receive the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor, mostly because my style is so typically Austrian.
I would not trade any of these features for anybody else’s.
Sometimes if you have a difficult decision to make, just stall until the answer presents itself.
These are dark times. Back in my Wildwood days with Janet, you were either blessed with a beautiful body or not. And if you were not, you could just chill out and learn a trade.
Amy Poehler and I have been friends for so long, we’re like Oprah and Gale. Only we’re not denying anything.
Don’t waste your energy trying to educate or change opinions; go over, under, through, and opinions will change organically when you’re the boss.
There is no one of-woman-born who does not like Red Lobster cheddar biscuits. Anyone who claims otherwise is a liar and a Socialist.
Why can’t we accept the human form as it is? Screams no one. I don’t know why, but we never have. That’s why people wore corsets and neck stretchers and powdered wigs.
Whatever the problem, be part of the solution. Don’t just sit around raising questions and pointing out obstacles.
Sometimes you want to have a very productive Saturday to feel that you are in control of your life, which of course you are not.
[…] things most people do naturally are often inexplicably difficult for me.
Seriously, I’ve just realized that almost everyone is a fraud, so I try not to feel too bad about it.
Luxury cruises were designed to make something unbearable—a two-week transatlantic crossing—seem bearable. There’s no need to do it now. There are planes.
All Beyoncé and JLo have done is add to the laundry list of attributes women must have to qualify as beautiful.
Ah, babies! They’re more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts.
If you ever start to feel too good about yourself, they have this thing called the Internet, and you can find a lot of people there who don’t like you.
I like to crack the jokes now and again, but it’s only because I struggle with math.
Tracy: Stop eating people’s old french fries, little pigeon. Have some self-respect. Don’t you know you can fly?
The difference between male comedy writers and female comedy writers is that the male ones are taller and weigh more.
Confidence is 10 per cent hard work and 90 per cent delusion.
I want to go to there.
Amazing Tina Fey Quotes
The eyes are the window to where the soul is supposed to be.
When hiring, mix Harvard Nerds with Chicago Improvisers and stir.
I prefer the retro chic of spending Christmas just like Mary and Joseph did- traveling arduously back to the place of your birth to be counted, with no guarantee of a bed when you get there.
This requires a level of delusion/egomania usually reserved for popes and drag queens.
[Confidence is] Just thinking foolishly that you will be able to do what you want to do.
I had my hair in a ponytail and looked my trademark exhausted.
In most cases being a good boss means hiring talented people and then getting out of their way.
Obviously, as an adult I realize this girl-on-girl sabotage is the third worst kind of female behavior, right behind saying ‘like’ all the time and leaving your baby in a dumpster.
A little tiny person with nothing to worry about running in circles, worried out of her mind.
When faced with sexism, or ageism, or lookism, or even really aggressive Buddhism, ask yourself the following question: ‘Is this person in between me and what I want to do?’ If the answer is no, ignore it and move on. Your energy is better used doing your work and outpacing people that way.
[…] I can’t possibly take time off for a second baby, unless I do, in which case that is nobody’s business and I’ll never regret it for a moment unless it ruins my life.
President Bush gave a rousing speech to the United Nations General Assembly. Afterward, in a touching show of support, every foreign dignitary shook hands with the president and smiled warmly as he mispronounced their names.
Either way, everything will be fine.
It is an impressively arrogant move to conclude that just because you don’t like something, it is empirically not good. I don’t like Chinese food, but I don’t write articles trying to prove it doesn’t exist.
I feel about Photoshop the way some people feel about abortion. It is appalling and a tragic reflection on the moral decay of our society… unless I need it, in which case, everybody be cool.
You can tell how smart people are by what they laugh at.
Contrary to what I believed as a little girl, being the boss almost never involves marching around, waving your arms, and chanting, ‘I am the boss! I am the boss!’
[…] nothing is creepier than a bunch of adults being very quiet.
Whatever the problem, be a part of the solution. Don’t just sit around raising questions and pointing out obstacles.
A combustion engine of ambition and disappointment.
That night’s show was watched by ten million people, so I guess that director at The Second City who said the audience ‘didn’t want to see a sketch with two women’ can go poop in his hat.
Am I just chasing it because it’s the hardest thing for me to get and I want to prove I can do it?
If you are a woman and you bought this book for practical tips on how to make it in a male-dominated workplace, here they are. No pigtails, no tube tops. Cry sparingly.
I had to get back to work. NBC has me under contract. The baby and I only have a verbal agreement.
Twitter seems like a busman’s holiday: just more writing. I have no plans to do it. I’ll just stick with my 24/7 webcam. I’m old-fashioned that way.
The Rule of Agreement reminds you to ‘respect what your partner has created’ and to at least start from an open-minded place. Start with a YES and see where that takes you.
And I can see Russia from my house.
The same ten minutes that magazines urge me to use for sit-ups and triceps dips, I used for sobbing.
I had to face the fact that I had been using my gay friends as props.
You have to try your hardest to be at the top of your game and improve every joke you can until the last possible second, and then you have to let it go.
Never tell a crazy person he’s crazy.
Say yes and you’ll figure it out later.