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have you ever felt it that quiet fear
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right when love starts to get close you
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meet someone you connect it feels good
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but then a wall goes up you pull back or
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they do suddenly it feels safer to
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retreat than to open if this sounds
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familiar you're not alone and Carl Young
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would tell you "This is one of the
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deepest struggles of the human heart."
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See most people think the hardest part
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of love is finding it but Young knew the
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hardest part is often receiving it
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because to truly let love in requires
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one thing many of us struggle with
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bravery jung wrote "There is no coming
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to consciousness without
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pain." And love real love brings us face
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to face with parts of ourselves that are
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still afraid afraid of being seen afraid
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of being hurt afraid of losing control
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so why is it so hard to let love in
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here's the truth Young revealed when
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love approaches it activates our shadow
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all the parts of us that believe I'm not
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enough i'll be abandoned i can't trust
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this i don't deserve this these old
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wounds rise to the surface not because
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the other person is doing anything wrong
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but because the opportunity for
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closeness awakens the parts of us that
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still fear it and here's the paradox the
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more we long for love the more our
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defenses try to block it because love
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brings with it vulnerability to love is
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to risk to trust to let someone see your
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imperfect heart jung believed that
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healing this pattern starts with one
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thing bringing the unconscious to light
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he wrote "Until you make the unconscious
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conscious it will direct your life and
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fate." If you don't face your fears of
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intimacy you'll keep sabotaging the very
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love you desire so how do you become
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brave enough to let love in here is a
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Youngian path to intimacy five essential
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steps step one own your fear most people
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try to deny it they tell themselves "I'm
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fine i just haven't met the right person
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i'm too busy for love." But deep down
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fear is running the show young taught
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that healing begins with honest
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self-awareness ask yourself "What am I
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afraid will happen if I let someone
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close what old wounds am I protecting?"
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Naming the fear is the first step to
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releasing its grip step two embrace your
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shadow your shadow holds the parts of
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you that believe you are unworthy of
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love the parts shaped by childhood
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wounds past betrayals cultural
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conditioning young didn't teach us to
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destroy the shadow he taught us to
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integrate it to say yes part of me is
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afraid and part of me longs to love you
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can hold both without shame step three
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practice self-compassion many people
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think they need to fix themselves before
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they can love but Jung reminds us
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wholeness is not about perfection it's
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about acceptance you don't need to be
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flawless to be loved you need to be
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authentic the more compassion you give
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yourself the more capacity you create to
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receive compassion from others step four
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take small brave steps bravery doesn't
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mean diving in head first it means
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leaning in little by little share
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something real express a need allow
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yourself to receive kindness each small
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act of openness build your capacity for
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intimacy jung wrote "A man who has not
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passed through the inferno of his
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passions has never overcome them you
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can't bypass the fear you move through
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it by practicing courage." Step five
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choose relationships that honor your
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becoming not every relationship is a
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safe space for growth jung believed that
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conscious relationships are those where
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both people support each other's
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individuation the journey of becoming
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their true selves seek out partners and
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friends who value honesty over
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perfection welcome vulnerability
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encourage your growth stand with you
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through the messy beautiful work of love
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so what does this look like in everyday
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life here are five ways to live this
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path notice when you're pulling away and
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pause with compassion share your truth
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even when it feels scary allow yourself
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to receive love compliments care set
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boundaries that protect your peace not
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your fear surround yourself with people
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who meet you with courage not control
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carl Young reminds us "Letting love in
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is not about eliminating fear it's about
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building bravery bravery to be seen
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bravery to be known bravery to love even
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knowing it may hurt." He wrote "Who
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looks outside dreams who looks inside
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awakes awaken to the truth you are
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worthy of love you are capable of love
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you can let it in." So today ask
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yourself where am I still guarding my
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heart too tightly what brave small step
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can I take toward intimacy today how can
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I honor my longing without abandoning my
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truth because the love you seek is not
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out there it begins in here in your
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willingness to be fully alive fully
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human fully seen if this message spoke
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to you comment below i choose to let
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love in and remember you are brave
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enough and the love that is meant for
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you will meet you in that bravery until
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next time stay open stay kind and keep
