Coffee is a brewed drink prepared from roasted coffee beans, the seeds of berries from certain Coffea species. Inspirational funny coffee quotes will brighten up your day and make you feel ready to take on anything.
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Famous Funny Coffee Quotes
No coffee can be good in the mouth that does not first send a sweet offering of odor to the nostrils. Henry Ward Beecher
What goes best with a cup of coffee? Another cup. Henry Rollins
The powers of a man’s mind are directly proportioned to the quantity of coffee he drinks. James Mackintosh
Science may never come up with a better office communication system than the coffee break. Earl Wilson
May your coffee be strong and your Monday be short. Unknown
Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee. Stephanie Piro
I had some dreams, they were clouds in my coffee. Carly Simon
Without my morning coffee, I’m just like a dried-up piece of goat. J.S. Bach
I never laugh until I’ve had my coffee. Clark Gable
When traveling with someone, take large dose of patience and tolerance with your morning coffee. Helen Hayes
Coffee is the common man’s gold, and like gold, it brings to every person the feeling of luxury and nobility. -Sheik-Abd-al-Kadir
Once you wake up and smell the coffee, it’s hard to go back to sleep. Fran Drescher
No matter what historians claimed, BC really stood for Before Coffee. Cherise Sinclair
The coffee is prepared in such a way that it makes those who drink it witty: at least there is not a single soul who, on quitting the house, does not believe himself four times wittier that when he entered it. Charles de Secondat Montesquieu
The second cup of coffee is never as good as the first. Theodore Roosevelt
Coffee is good for talent, but genius wants prayer. Ralph Waldo Emerson
I was taken by the power that savoring a simple cup of coffee can have to connect people and create community. Howard Schultz
Adventure in life is good; consistency in coffee even better. Justina Chen
There’s nothing sweeter than a cup of bitter coffee. Rian Aditia
It’s amazing how the world begins to change through the eyes of a cup of coffee. Donna A. Favors
A morning coffee is my favorite way of starting the day, settling the nerves so that they don’t later fray. Marcia Carrington
He was my cream, and I was his coffee. And when you poured us together, it was something. Josephine Baker
Coffee in England always tastes like a chemistry experiment. Agatha Christie
People don’t stop eating, and they don’t stop drinking coffee. Magic Johnson
Some of the world’s most effective thoughts happen over a brew of morning’s coffee Prabhukrishna
If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. Abraham Lincoln
Amazing Funny Coffee Quotes
I think if I were a woman I’d wear coffee as a perfume. John William Van Druten
I orchestrate my mornings to the tune of coffee. Terri Guillemets
Good communication is just as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after. Anne Morrow Lindbergh
The morning cup of coffee has an exhilaration about it which the cheering influence of the afternoon or evening cup of tea cannot be expected to reproduce. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Coffee keeps me going until it’s time for wine. Unknown
But even a bad cup of coffee is better than no coffee at all. New York has great water for coffee. David Lynch
As long as there was coffee in the world, how bad could things be? Cassandra Clare
Coffee is a language in itself Jackie Chan
Coffee is a way of stealing time that should by rights belong to your older self. Terry Pratchett
I’ll quit coffee. It won’t be easy drinking my Bailey’s straight, but I’ll get used to it. It’ll still be the best part of waking up. Megan Mullally
Coffee is the common man’s gold, and like gold, it brings to every person the feeling of luxury and nobility. Sheik-Abd-al-Kadir
If I asked for a cup of coffee, someone would search for the double meaning. Mae West
I would rather suffer from coffee than be senseless. Napoleon Bonaparte
The morning cup of coffee has an exhilaration about it which the cheering influence of the afternoon or evening cup of tea cannot be expected to reproduce. Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.
I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake. Lewis Black
I can’t imagine a day without coffee. I can’t imagine! Howard Schultz
To me, the smell of fresh-made coffee is one of the greatest inventions. Hugh Jackman
Our culture runs on coffee and gasoline, the first often tasting like the second. Edward Abbey
Coffee was a food in that house, not a drink. Patricia Hampl
I could smell myself awake with that coffee. Jaesse Tyler
Even bad coffee is better than no coffee at all. David Lynch
Coffee is a language in itself. Jackie Chan
Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank. Alphonse Allais
I don’t see the point in caffeine without coffee. Or coffee without caffeine, for that matter. Robyn Schneider
Coffee should be black as hell, strong as death and sweet as love.- Turkish proverb
Coffee first. Schemes later. Leanna Renee Hieber
Without my morning coffee, I’m just like a dried-up piece of goat. Johann Sebastian Bach
Way too much coffee. But if it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever. David Letterman
Black coffee must be strong and very hot; if strong coffee does not agree with you, do not drink black coffee. And if you do not drink black coffee, do not drink any coffee at all. Andre Simon
It turned out people truly did cry into their coffee cups. Jodi Picoult
Given enough coffee I could rule the world. Terry Pratchett
Coffee, the favorite drink of the civilized world. Thomas Jefferson
The coffee was so strong it snarled as it lurched out of the pot. Betty MacDonald
Science may never come up with a better office communication system than the coffee break. -Earl Wilson
I judge a restaurant by the bread and the coffee. Burt Lancaster
Coffee makes us severe, and grave, and philosophical. Jonathan Swift
