40+ Best Funny Hair Quotes: Exclusive Selection

We have compiled a list of the most fascinating and fun facts about hair. Inspirational funny hair quotes will fire up your brain and inspire you to look at life differently while making you laugh.

If you’re searching for extremely funny quotes and funniest thanksgiving quotes that perfectly capture what you’d like to say or just want to feel inspired yourself, browse through an amazing collection of extremely funny engagement quotes, hilarious Easter quotes and funniest drinking quotes.

Famous Funny Hair Quotes

Men’s fame is like their hair, which grows after they are dead, and with just as little use to them. George Villiers

Your hair is 90% of your selfie.

I’m a big woman. I need big hair. Aretha Franklin

I’m undaunted in my quest to amuse myself by constantly changing my hair. Hillary Rodham Clinton

If I want to knock a story off the front page, I just change my hairstyle. Hillary Rodham Clinton

I’ve discovered that how I look is not a function of anything as ephemeral as my hair. Judith Light

Men don’t get smarter as they grow older, they just lose their hair. Mary Astor

funny hair quotes

I have a new hairstyle today. It’s called “I tried”.

What a curious way to do your hair- or, rather, not to do it. Marlene Dietrich

I’m losing my hair where I want hair, and getting hair where I don’t. Billy Crystal

Grey hair is a blessing. Ask any bald man.

I’m fine, but you’re obviously having a bad hair day. Kristy Samson

I’ve had hangovers before, but this time even my hair hurts. Rock Hudson

If you want to get ahead in business, you’ve got to have serious hair. Melanie Griffith

Some girls do a messy ponytail and look like a princess. I do a messy ponytail and look like a founding father.

My blackness has never been in my hair. Blackness is not a hairstyle. Bertha Gilkey

You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little potbelly and a bald spot. Elayne Boosler

Gray hair is God’s graffiti.

The tenderest spot in a man’s makeup is sometimes the bald spot on top of his head. Helen Rowland

Nobody is really happy with what’s on their head. People with straight hair want curly, people with curly want straight, and bald people want everyone to be blind.

My real hair color is kind of a dark blonde. Now I just have mood hair. Julia Roberts

I’m not offended by all the dumb-blonde jokes because I know that I’m not dumb. I also know I’m not blonde. Dolly Parton

I got my hair highlighted because I felt that some strands were more important than others.

I refuse to think of them as chin hairs. I think of them as stray eyebrows. Janette Barber

Oh, who is that young sinner with the handcuffs on his wrists? / And what has he been after that they groan and shake his fists? / And wherefore is he wearing such a conscience-stricken air? / Oh, they’re taking him to prison for the colour of his hair. A.E. Housman

Top Funny Hair Quotes

You look like you comb your hair with an eggbeater. Lawrence Dorfman

Men don’t get smarter as they grow older; they just lose their hair. Mary Astor

I got my hair highlighted because I felt that some strands were more important than others. Mitch Hedberg

A celebrity is any well-known TV or movie star who looks like he spends more than two hours working on his hair. Steve Martin

And then the humidity said today I will make you look like the lion king.

I read somewhere that hair grows until you reach 40, then it goes in the opposite direction, into the head, and out the ears, nose and other odd places. Tim Allen

I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day. Now I can’t get the cobwebs out of her hair. Tommy Cooper

Beauty comes from the inside. Inside the hair salon.

Even geniuses can get things wrong. Look at Einstein’s unfortunate choice of a hairdresser. Joss Stirling

Naturally curly hair is a curse, and don’t ever let anyone tell you different. Mary Ann Shaffer

Interviewer: so frank, you have long hair. Does that make you a woman? Frank Zappa: you have a wooden leg. Does that make you a table? Frank Zappa

Her hair was a glory of tendrils for the snaring of husbands. Michael Chabon

If my hair gets any frizzier, I’ll shave it to the scalp. Or light it on fire. Whichever is easier. Victoria Scott

Life is more beautiful when you meet the right hairdresser. Calvin Klein

My toes are a total wreck, my fingernails worse, and god knows my hair could use a registered nurse. Jack Bunbury

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