51+ Best Funny Science Quotes: Exclusive Selection

Science is a systematic enterprise that builds and organizes knowledge in the form of testable explanations and predictions about the universe. Inspirational funny science quotes will brighten up your day and make you feel ready to take on anything.

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Famous Funny Science Quotes

Scientists are peeping toms at the keyhole of eternity. – Arthur Koestler

Science knows no country, because knowledge belongs to humanity, and is the torch which illuminates the world. – Louis Pasteur

Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking. – Dave Barry

I had trouble with physics in college. When I signed up I thought it said psychics. – Greg Tamblyn

The Big Bang Explained: somebody told God a great joke when God had a mouthful of milk. – Unknown

When science finally locates the center of the universe, some people will be surprised to learn they’re not it. – Bernard Bailey

Science has now determined there is a direct relationship between the way the ball bounces and the cookie crumbles. – Unknown

Science means constantly walking a tightrope between blind faith and curiosity; between expertise and creativity; between bias and openness; between experience and epiphany; between ambition and passion; and between arrogance and conviction – in short, between and old today and a new tomorrow. – Henrich Rohrer

I see they found out the universe is 80 million years older than we thought. It’s also been lying about its weight. – Bill Maher

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That’s relativity. – Albert Einstein

Creationists make it sound as though a ‘theory’ is something you dreamt up after being drunk all night. – Isaac Asimov

funny science quotes

There’s an old saying among scientific guys: “You can’t make an omelet without breaking eggs, ideally by dropping a cement truck on them from a crane.” – Dave Barry

Being a scientist is like doing a jigsaw puzzle in a snowstorm at night, with some pieces missing, and with no idea what the finished picture looks like. – Unknown

Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us. – Bill Watterson

Electricity is really just organized lightning. – George Carlin

Nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood. Now is the time to understand more, so that we may fear less. – Marie Curie

If we knew what we were doing, it wouldn’t be called research. – Albert Einstein

When kids look up to great scientists the way they do musicians, actors [and sports figures], civilization will jump to the next level. – Brian Greene

I don’t believe in astrology; I’m a Sagittarian and we’re skeptical. – Arthur C. Clarke

I see they found out the universe is 80 million years older than we thought. It’s also been lying about its weight. – Bill Maher ?

funniest science quotes

Nothing travels faster than the speed of light, with the possible exception of bad news, which obeys its own set of laws. – Douglas Adams

We are just an advanced breed of monkeys on a minor planet of a very average star. But we can understand the Universe. That makes us something very special. – Stephen Hawking

What is a scientist after all? It is a curious man looking through a keyhole, the keyhole of nature, trying to know what’s going on. – Jacques Yves Cousteau

Science, never solves a problem without creating ten more. – George Bernard Shaw

That’s the whole problem with science. You’ve got a bunch of empiricists trying to describe things of unimaginable wonder. – Bill Watterson

The important thing is to never stop questioning [or learning]. – Albert Einstein

If you want to have good ideas, you must have many ideas. – Linus Pauling

If your result needs a statistician then you should design a better experiment. – Ernest Rutherford

An important scientific innovation rarely makes its way by gradually winning over and converting its opponents: What does happen is that the opponents gradually die out. – Max Planck

Occams Razor is the scientific principle that, all things being equal, the simplest explanation is always the dog ate my homework. – Greg Tamblyn

extremely funny science quotes

When you get right down to it, almost every explanation Man came up with for anything until about 1926 was stupid. – Dave Barry

My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted. – Steven Wright

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the universe. – Albert Einstein

Every science begins as philosophy and ends as art. – Will Durant

We cannot solve problems with the same thinking we used to create them. – Albert Einstein

Research is to see what everybody else has seen, and to think what nobody else has thought. – Albert Szent

If math was taught like science in Kansas, Texas, and Tennessee, then 2+2=5 would be a “competing theory.”-Unknown Author

We don’t devote enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks. – Bill Watterson

What you learn from a life in science is the vastness of our ignorance. – David Eagleman

Why would you clone people when you can go to bed with them and make a baby? C’mon, it’s stupid. – Ray Bradbury

We only have to look at ourselves to see how intelligent life might develop into something we wouldn’t want to meet. – Stephen Hawking

If I have seen further it is by standing on the shoulders of Giants. – Issac Newton

I am among those who think that science has great beauty. – Marie Curie

The goal of science and engineering is to build better mousetraps. The goal of nature is to build better mice. – Unknown

hilarious science quotes

Maybe this world is another planet’s hell. – Aldous Huxley

All outstanding work, in art as well as in science, results from immense zeal applied to a great idea. – Santiago Ramón y Cajal

The reward of the young scientist is the emotional thrill of being the first person in the history of the world to see something or to understand something. Nothing can compare with that experience. – Cecilia Payne-Gaposchkin

There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened. – Douglas Adams

If you know you are on the right track, if you have this inner knowledge, then nobody can turn you off… no matter what they say. – Barbara McClintock

The good thing about science is that it’s true whether or not you believe in it.- Neil deGrasse Tyson

My knowledge of the universe is that if I write stupid jokes, the universe gives me a really nice house and great meals. I do not believe mankind will ever develop a formula to explain this. – Joel Klein

Apparently there are three levels of brain activity. Level 1 is the lowest level – the amount of concentration required to, say, delete emails or serve in congress. – Bruce Cameron

Above all, don’t fear difficult moments. The best comes from them. – Rita Levi-Montalcini

In science the credit goes to the man who convinces the world, not to the man to whom the idea first occurs. – Sir William Osler

Our virtues and our failures are inseparable, like force and matter. When they separate, man is no more. – Nikola Tesla

Science is a wonderful thing if one does not have to earn one’s living at it. – Albert Einstein

Science is not only a disciple of reason but also one of romance and passion. – Stephen Hawking

We all understand the twinge of discomfort at the thought that we share a common ancestor with the apes. No one can embarrass you like a relative. – Neal DeGrasse Tyson

Everything is theoretically impossible, until it is done. – Robert A. Heinlein.

Yet another spunky li’l NASA robot lands and begins transmitting back photographs of rocks that appear virtually identical to the rock photos beamed back by all the other spunky li’l NASA robots, thus confirming suspicions that the universe has a LOT of rocks in it. – Dave Barry

Impossible only means that you haven’t found the solution yet.- Anonymous

Science and everyday life cannot and should not be separated. – Rosalind Franklin

Every brilliant experiment, like every great work of art, starts with an act of imagination.- Jonah Lehrer

The dinosaurs became extinct because they didn’t have a space program. And if we become extinct because we don’t have a space program, it’ll serve us right! – Larry Niven

I’m human; never been to space. Monkeys aren’t human; have been to space. That’s the gist of my lawsuit against NASA. – Mike Vanatta

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