We are our worst critics. Not only are we blind to our own qualities, but we always know which of our flaws hurt the most. That silent, but powerful sound of self-criticism and self-doubt is all too familiar. It keeps echoing in our minds, following every step we make and pointing out our own mistakes. And then, for a while, it seems as if it went completely silent until it comes back louder than ever. Overwhelmed by that persistent voice, we finally give in to the belief that we are unworthy and a failure. We stay within our comfort zones, miss out on opportunities and fail to find happiness. However, it doesn’t have to be this way. We don’t have to be a victim to our own inner critic. Instead, we can stand up to it and silence it forever. It’s not going to be easy – the critic will fight back, but if we learn to recognise our own value and boost our self-esteem, that voice will fade away.
Break the negative thought pattern
Once we give in to our negative thoughts, they just keep spiralling out of control. Instead of just giving in and falling into that vicious circle, you need to break this negative pattern. It’s important that you silence your inner critic the moment they start overwhelming you with self-doubt. Breaking the pattern might be difficult at first, but eventually, the voice of your inner critic will fade away. You can stop your thoughts by finding an anchor that will keep you connected to the present moment or by simply telling yourself to stop. You may also find it useful to keep a journal of your thoughts and feelings. This way, you’ll be able to gain a more profound understanding of your mind and an insight into your thought patterns. Afterwards, you may find it easier to stop the pattern as soon as it arises.
Stop comparing yourself to others
If you keep comparing yourself to others, you’ll always find something that will make you feel less worthy and less successful. The truth is, there will always be people in a better or worse position than yours. Instead of focusing on their success, accomplishments and lives, you should compare yourself to your previous self. This will help you see how much you’ve progressed over the years, which will boost your self-esteem. It can also help you further improve by allowing you to take an objective view of your previous self and some mistakes you’ve made.
Talk about it
Opening up can be quite difficult for some people because it makes them feel embarrassed and vulnerable. However, keeping all of your feelings bottled inside will only make you feel worse. Not only will you feel lonely and isolated, but those negative thoughts will become completely exaggerated. At times, when we say something out loud, we realise how silly it actually is. Thus, it’s of the utmost importance that you find support and share your feelings. If you feel uncomfortable talking about this with your friends and family, you can always talk to a professional counsellor. Different types of therapy, including support groups, talk therapies and online counselling, such as personal Supportive sessions, offer great flexibility and different approaches, so you can find one that meets your preferences and fits your schedule. Don’t hesitate to seek professional help because a counsellor can guide you to self-discovery, help you change your negative patterns and lead you to self-acceptance.
Don’t live by other people’s expectations
Letting others set the standards for your happiness and success will only contribute to your dissatisfaction with yourself. We all listen to other people’s advice from time to time, especially when it comes from our friends and families. However, this doesn’t mean that we should blindly abide by everyone else’s rules and completely neglect ourselves. You need to focus on what makes you feel good about yourself. If other people don’t understand your choices, you shouldn’t burden yourself with their opinion. Once you’ve let go of what other people think of you, their disapproval or criticism won’t have any effect on you.
Set up your life goals
Focusing on a specific goal will give you a purpose in life. Not only will you make yourself busy by working towards your goals, but you’ll also have an opportunity to progress. However, in order to silence your inner critic, you should divide your major goals into smaller, attainable ones. Going one step at a time will boost your confidence and help you achieve success. You should write down your goals and cross them off the list once you’ve achieved them. This will help you keep track of your progress and show you that you are capable and successful. Finally, make sure to reward yourself once you’ve attained your goals, be they big or small. You deserve to be happy, so celebrate it.
Self-doubt is one of the greatest obstacles on your way to success, so make sure to silence your inner critic and improve your self-esteem. Only then will you truly be happy.