“My memories erupt like dead-gray trees out of the dark depths where feelings feed. I am a stone at the bottom, seen through the swirls. I want to rise, but am unmoved by the ceaseless currents of the past. The only place that these things, water and relationships live are in my mind.
I give them life. I continue their being. The runoff from the past floods around my chin. It’s rising fast. My feelings spill out, spill down, splash and crash, there’s no stopping them. Play in them. Drown in them.
This water should baptize and bless me. But it threatens to sink me. I still bend to his will even though his will does not exist any longer. He has possessed my spirit from this sunken tomb of emotion. I drown.”
An excerpt from my book, Present Tense. It’s free on Amazon for the next few days. Only available through Amazon online. You can find it here. It’s always free if you have Kindle Unlimited. I’m only sharing here because it’s free for a limited time. Please check it out, it’s a short, vignette-style memoir regarding abuse and complex PTSD. It doesn’t have clinical advice, just memories. Thanks for reading.