To overcome procrastination, we need to increase motivation and determination to keep going. But, it doesn’t have to be hard, we can have fun along the way! Best funny motivational quotes will help us stay focused and stay loose while making us laugh.
If you’re searching for extremely funny quotes and greatest funny inspirational quotes that perfectly capture what you’d like to say or just want to feel inspired yourself, browse through an amazing collection of popular funny Friday quotes, top funny friendship quotes and clever short jokes.
When you need that extra push for work, let funniest motivational quotes inspire you to achieve your goals while also putting a smile on your face.
Funny Motivational Quotes
You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club. Jack London
The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs, one step at a time. Joe Girard
Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive. Elbert Hubbard
I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific. Lily Tomlin
If you let your head get too big, it’ll break your neck. Elvis Presley
The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe. Eat cake.
If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito. Dalai Lama
People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing that’s why we recommend it daily. Zig Ziglar
If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you. Steven Wright
I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.
Dear life, when I said: ‘Can my day get any worse?’ It was rhetorical, not a challenge.
When you have failed at being nice, you’ve actually succeeded in being mean. Success is everywhere if you know where to look for it. Katina Ferguson
Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing ’til it gets there. Josh Billings
I find television very educational. Every time someone turns it on, I go in the other room and read a book. Groucho Marx
I am big enough to admit that I am often inspired by myself. Leslie Knope
Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. Dale Carnegie
A diamond is merely a lump of coal that did well under pressure.
I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying. Oscar Wilde
All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure. Mark Twain
Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead
The process of learning is a nonstop orgy of wonderment. Lev Grossman
I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work. Thomas A. Edison
People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day. Winnie the Pooh
If you don’t know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else. Yogi Berra
Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work. Thomas Edison
The trouble with being punctual is that nobody’s there to appreciate it. Franklin P. Jones
Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever you were gonna do anyway. Robert Downey Jr.
Life is like a sewer… what you get out of it depends on what you put into it. Tom Lehrer
Keep your tears in your eyes where they belong. Ron Swanson
There never was a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him asleep. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Aspire to inspire before we expire. Eugene Bell Jr.
Nothing is impossible, the word itself says ‘I’m possible’! Audrey Hepburn
You can’t have everything. Where would you put it? Steven Wright
If you’re going to be thinking, you may as well think big. Donald Trump
It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn’t give it up because by then I was too famous. Robert Benchley
When you pray be careful of how you respond to what you get. I read somewhere that if you pray for rain. Don’t complain about the mud! Hyacinth Mottley
Short Funny Motivational Quotes
I know worrying works, because none of the stuff I worried about ever happened. Will Rogers
t’s a funny thing about life, once you begin to take note of the things you are grateful for, you begin to lose sight of the things that you lack. Germany Kent
Opportunity does not knock, it presents itself when you beat down the door. Kyle Chandler
Change is not a four-letter word… but often your reaction to it is! Jeffrey Gitomer
Luck is what you have left over after you give 100 percent. Langston Coleman
The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces. Will Rogers
The dumbest people I know are those who know it all. Malcolm Forbes
Opportunity is always knocking. The problem is that most people have the self-doubt station in their heads turned up way too loud to hear it. Brian Vaszily
Never follow someone else’s path unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost, and you see a path then by all means you should follow that. Ellen DeGeneres
I enjoy growing older and wiser and learning from my mistakes every single day. Ellen DeGeneres
The world is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper. Bertrand Russell
Bad decisions make good stories. Ellis Vidler
See the world like a big wardrobe. Everybody has his own costume. There is only one that fits you perfectly. George Harris
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. Alan Dundes
Fire and swords are slow engines of destruction, compared to the tongue of a gossip. Richard Steele
If you reach for a star, you might not get one. But you won’t come up with a hand full of mud either. Leo Burnett
Funny Motivational Quotes To Start The Day
To think is easy. To act is hard. But the hardest thing in the world is to act in accordance with your thinking. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot. Sleep for a while. Wake up beautiful.
Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia. Charles Schulz
Morning is wonderful. Its only drawback is that it comes at such an inconvenient time of day. Glen Cook
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
I’ll probably never fully become what I wanted to be when I grew up, but that’s probably because I wanted to be a ninja princess. Cassandra Duffy
Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget tossing in the lifeboats. Voltaire
I want to live my life in such a way that when I get out of bed in the morning, the devil says, “aw s***, he’s up! Steve Maraboli
If you don’t have wrinkles, you haven’t laughed enough. Phyllis Diller
Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished – If you’re alive it isn’t. Richard Bach
Learn the rules like a pro, so you can break them like an artist. Pablo Picasso
When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye. Cathy Guisewite
When I hear somebody sigh, Life is hard, I am always tempted to ask, ‘Compared to what?’ Sydney Harris
A day without sunshine is like, you know, night. Steve Martin
Life is like the stock market. Some days you’re up. Some days you’re down. And some days you feel like something the bull left behind. Paula Wall
If you’re going through hell, keep going. Winston Churchill
A clear conscience is a sure sign of a bad memory. Mark Twain
The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office. Robert Frost
A good time for laughing is when you can. Jessamyn West
If you hang out with chickens, you’re going to cluck and if you hang out with eagles, you’re going to fly. Steve Maraboli
I didn’t fail the test. I just found 100 ways to do it wrong. Benjamin Franklin
We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing. George Bernard Shaw
Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest. Mark Twain
I’m not confused. I’m just well mixed. Robert Frost
Only he who attempts the absurd is capable of achieving the impossible. Miguel de Unamuno
The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up. Mark Twain
It is bad to suppress laughter. It goes back down and spreads to your hips. Fred Allen
The only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible. Arthur C. Clarke
Whenever I’m about to do something, I think ‘Would an idiot do that?’ Dwight Schrute
Optimist: someone who figures that taking a step backward after taking a step forward is not a disaster, it’s more like a cha-cha. Robert Brault
The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for. Maureen Dowd
The question isn’t who is going to let me, it’s who is going to stop me. Ayn Rand.
It takes less time to do things right than to explain why you did it wrong. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
When you’re riding, only the race in which you’re riding is important. Bill Shoemaker
There are no traffic jams along the extra mile. Roger Staubach
You’re only given a little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it. Robin Williams
Funniest Motivational Sayings About Life, Work & Happiness
Looking for a good laugh and motivation at the same time? Legends never die, and with a lot of punchlines, funny movie one-liners and famous quotes from TV series will make you laughter in a unique comedic style. Between best quotes from Parks and Rec quotes, The Office inspirational quotes and most hilarious Spongebob quotes, all of them will help put a smile on your face.
- The key to success is not through achievement but through enthusiasm. Malcolm Forbes
- Edison failed 10,000 times before he made the electric light. Do not be discouraged if you fail a few times. Napoleon Hill
- I am an early bird and a night owl… so I am wise, and I have worms. Michael Scott
- I cannot afford to waste my time making money. Louis Agassiz
- Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change. Wayne W. Dyer
- Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings. Robert Bloch
- I choose a lazy person to do a hard job, because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it. Bill Gates
- If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito. Betty Reese
- Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it. Dwight D. Eisenhower
- No man goes before his time—unless the boss leaves early. Groucho Marx
- The difference between genius and stupidity is; genius has its limits. Albert Einstein
- Live each day like it’s your second to the last. That way you can fall asleep at night. Jason Love
- Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back. Oscar Wilde
- It takes sunshine and rain to make a rainbow. There would be no rainbows without sunshine and rain. Roy T. Bennett
- Even a stopped clock is right twice every day. After some years, it can boast of a long series of successes. Marie Von Ebner-Eschenbach
- Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it’s better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring. Marilyn Monroe
- Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance, or a stranger. Franklin P. Jones
- Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight. Phyllis Diller
- Good things come to those who wait… greater things come to those who get off their ass and do anything to make it happen.
- By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day. Robert Frost
- Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed, citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. Margaret Mead
- Sometimes life knocks you [down]… get up, get up, get up!!! Happiness is not the absence of problems, it’s the ability to deal with them. Steve Maraboli
- The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it. Terry Pratchett
- The only place where your dreams become impossible is in your own thinking. Robert H Shuller
- Age is of no importance unless you’re a cheese. Billie Burke
- A few harmless flakes working together can unleash an avalanche of destruction.
- Trying is the first step toward failure. Homer Simpson
- The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones. Confucius
- A few harmless flakes working together can unleash an avalanche of destruction. Justin Sewell
- Goal setting is similar to traveling from point A to point B within a city. If you clearly understand what the goal is, you will definitely reach the destination because you know its address. Thomas Abreu
- It could be that your purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others. Ashleigh Brilliant
- Be yourself; everyone else is already taken. Oscar Wilde
- If you fall, I’ll always be there. The Floor
- If you’re going to be able to look back on something and laugh about it, you might as well laugh about it now. Marie Osmond
- Life is too short to be serious all the time. So, if you can’t laugh at yourself, Call me….I’ll laugh at you.
- First, they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, and then you win. Mahatma Gandhi
- You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t possibly live long enough to make them all yourself. Sam Levenson
- If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? George Carlin
- Watching a person who successfully loses fifty pounds and changes her life is more inspirational than listening to a fitness coach with a perfect body. Martin Meadows
- Without ambition one starts nothing. Without work, one finishes nothing. The prize will not be sent to you. You have to win it. Ralph Waldo Emerson
- I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade. And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka and have a party. Ron White
- The only time I don’t have any problems in this world is when I am already six feet below the ground. James Jason
- When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down ‘happy’. They told me I didn’t understand the assignment, and I told them they didn’t understand life. John Lennon
- You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who’ll decide where to go. Dr. Seuss
- A woman is like a tea bag – you can’t tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water. Eleanor Roosevelt
- Work until your bank account looks like a phone number.
- Follow your passion, stay true to yourself, never follow someone else’s path unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost, and you see a path then by all means you should follow that. Ellen DeGeneres
- Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor. Truman Capote
- It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question. Eugene Ionesco Decouvertes
- Life begins at 40 – but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times. Helen Rowland
- The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.
- Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right. Isaac Asimov
- Whoever said, ‘It’s not whether you win or lose that counts,’ probably lost. Martina Navratilova
- Talent hits a target no one else can hit. Genius hits a target no one else can see. Arthur Schopenhauer
- When you do not know what you are doing and what you are doing is the best that is inspiration. Robert Bresson
- Be happy – it drives people crazy.
- I intend to live forever. So far, so good. Steven Wright
- If you don’t design your own life plan, chances are you’ll fall into someone else’s plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much.
- My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far, I’ve finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already. Dave Barry
- Too much of a good thing can be wonderful. Mae West
- Dreams are like rainbows. Only idiots chase them.
- When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.
- Hating people is like burning down your own home to get rid of a rat. Harry Emerson Fosdick
Funny Encouraging Quotes
- Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow. Mark Twain
- I have a simple philosophy: Fill what is empty. Empty what is full. Scratch where it itches. Alice Roosevelt Longworth
- You can’t shine like a diamond, if you not willing to get cut like a diamond! Eric Thomas
- You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred. Woody Allen
- You can, you should, and if you’re brave enough to start, you will. Stephen King
- My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. Mitch Hedberg
- The only time I feel light-hearted is when I’m in a plane at 33,000 feet. Robert Rivers
- You must pay for your sins. If you have already paid, please ignore this notice. Sam Levenson
- It’s okay to look at the past and the future. Just don’t stare. Lisa Lieberman-Wang
- Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please. Mark Twain
- Every tattoo is temporary, because we’re all slowly dying.
- I have to be successful because I like expensive things. Lisa Lieberman-Wang
- I am blessed with a funny gene that makes me enjoy life. Karan Patel
- Wisdom comes from experience. Experience is often a result of lack of wisdom. Terry Pratchett
- The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept. George Carlin
- Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds. Albert Einstein
- I figured something out. The future is unpredictable. John Green
- The best things in life are actually really expensive.
- Think like a proton. Always positive.
- To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone. Reba McEntire
- You grow up the day you have your first real laugh at yourself. Ethel Barrymore
- A mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work if it is not open. Frank Zappa
- I was never really insane except upon occasions when my heart was touched. Edgar Allan Poe
- Think left and think right and think low and think high. Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try! Dr. Seuss
- Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could. Charles J. Sykes
- Life doesn’t imitate art, it imitates bad television. Woody Allen
- We are all here on earth to help others; what on earth the others are here for I don’t know. W. H. Auden
- Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there. Will Rogers
- Happiness is just sadness that hasn’t happened yet.
- Be happy – it drives people crazy.
- People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing. Will Rogers
- I’m bored’ is a useless thing to say. I mean, you live in a great, big, vast world that you’ve seen none percent of. Even the inside of your own mind is endless; it goes on forever, inwardly, do you understand? The fact that you’re alive is amazing, so you don’t get to say ‘I’m bored. Louis C.K.
- Always remember that you are unique. Just like everybody else.
- Well-behaved women seldom make history. Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
- I refuse to entertain negativity. Life is too big and time is too short to get caught up in empty drama.